Welcome to Potpourri

Father Larry Morrissey_10(26)1926–02(05)2009, R.I.P.

Father Daniel E. Galas, 1930–2008 – RIP

Father Donald Wilger, 07(22)2008_R.I.P.

Jim Magmer, 11(14)1922–12(18)2008 – R.I.P.

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Obituary for Robert "Bob" Diekmann, February 3,2008

In Loving memory of Robert Diekmann, May 16, 1932 - February 3, 2008

Indian Prayer for Peace
Oh, Great Spirit who dwells in the sky,
Lead us to the path of peace and understanding,
Let all of us live together as brothers and sisters.
Our lives are so short here, walking upon Mother Earth's surface.
Let our eyes be opened to all the blessings you have given us.
Please hear our prayers. Oh, Great Spirit.

God, grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change...
Courage to change the things I can, and
Wisdom to know the difference.
Buried from Kutis Funeral Home May He rest in Peace.

Obituary Of Frank Matt Tonkovich, May 12, 2008

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Obituary of Frank Matt Tonkovich, May 12, 2008

Monday, May 12,20082
BILLINGS – Frank Matt Tonkovich, 88 – OBITUARY
“At the age of 88, our dear father, grandfather; great-grandfather; uncle and friend, Frank Tonkovich died peacefully on Saturday, May 10, 2008, at Valley Healthcare Center, with his family at his side. Frank was born August 17, 1919, the son of Matt and Domenica (Brodarich) Tonkovich in Butte.
After high school graduation, during WWII, Frank joined the Army Air Corps where he trained pilots in Great Bend, Kansas. Upon his discharge, he moved to Seattle where he gained employment with Boeing Aircraft. Later, Frank attended Gonzaga University in Washington, studying for the seminary. After deciding the seminary wasn't his calling, he returned to Montana and continued his education at Carroll College in Helena and began a long career as a teacher. He also served in law enforcement as a parole officer and was a staff member at Montana State University Billings, formerly EMC.
Frank met the love of his life, Mina Dunning in Butte while Mina was a Navy recruiter in Butte. They were united in marriage on Oct. 6,1956. Beginning a new life together, Frank and Mina moved to Alaska. They both taught school in Haines, Alaska I before settling in-Juneau where they were blessed with 4 children: James, Dolly, Jeff and Anna Lee. In 1972 as a family they moved back to Montana.
Frank was an active member of the Knights of Columbus, past Grand Knight; a longtime member of St. Pius X Catholic Church; was an organizer for a number of years of the Billings Tamburitzan Festival, which this year was held on Saturday evening, May 10 with a special pre-planned segment honoring Frank.
Frank leaves behind his children: James (Patty) of Billings, Domenica "Dolly" (Greg) Burnett, Jeff Tonkovich all of Atlanta, GA, Anna Lee (Eric) Daymo of Pasco, Wash.; grandchildren: Taylor Tonkovich of Billings, Tim, JJ and Ambrosia Tonkovich of Salt Lake City, Cassy Homme of Las Vegas, Jeremy (Mickey) Homme of Salt Lake City and Lilli Tonkovich of Atlanta, Benjamin, Bailey and Rebekkah Daymo of Dublin, Ohio; great-grandson Preston Homme of Salt Lake City; niece Andrea (Steve) Shannon of Butte; nephew Andy (Evelyn) Groo of Laguna Beach, Calif.
He was preceded in death by his parents; wife, Mina; great-grand-daughter Elleanna Homme; sisters: Mary Jurick and Vinky Groo.
Visitation was held Monday, May 12, from 3 to 5 pm. at Dahl Funeral Chapel, and a Vigil began at 7 p.m. Funeral Mass for Frank was held at 11 a.m. Tuesday at St. Pius X Catholic Church. Frank was committed to rest next to Mina in St. Pius Calvary Cemetery immediately following the service. Memorials may be made to St Pius X Building Fund, 7171 8th St. W, Billings, 59102.”

Obituary Of Clinton "Bill" J. Phillips, May 10, 2008

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Obituary of Clinton "Bill" J. Phillips, May 10, 2008

CLINTON "Bill" J. PHILLIPS – Kirkwood. MO, died May 10, 2008.
“Billy, Dad, Uncle Bill, Grandpa. Survived by his wife of 61 years, Sallie Multack Phillips, a daughter Lucy Jewkes (Parry) of Palm Desert CA and a son Ben (Angela) of Kirkwood and four grandchildren, Ryan, Robin, Clint and Ben. Brother Thomas E. Phillips, Sr. (Marianne) and the late Pat Shea Braun and numerous Phillips, Shea, Cox, Tuchschmidt and Mize nieces and nephews. Son of the late Percy and Mary Eaton Phillips.
To join the war effort, he graduated early from Chaminade High School in January 1945 and enlisted In the Army Air Corp. in June 1945, due to a surplus of pilots, he received an honorable discharge from the Air Corp., and two days later, enlisted in the United States Marine Corps providing service to his country in WWII and the Korean War. Phillips retired in 1982 from Phillips Furniture Co., which he operated with his brother Tom. He spent the winters in Palm Desert, CA, living and playing golf at the Oasis Country Club where he was known as ‘down-the-middle Bill’. He was also an avid outdoorsman. He´ll be missed greatly for many seasons to come. Semper Fi. Memorial Mass at St. Peters, noon Saturday May 17, 2008. Body donated to St. Louis University.
Contributions in his honor to the Injured Marine Semper Fi Fund.”

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“Jerry L. Gosselink, 59
Brush man worked as electrician, Port of Entry officer

Jerry Lee Gosselink, 59, of Brush died Tuesday morning August 21st at the East Morgan County Hospital in Brush.
Gosselink was born Dec. 23, 1947, in Oskaloosa, Iowa, to Lynn and Wilma (Vande Geest) Gosselink. He moved to Morgan County from Denver 12 years ago. He worked as an electrician for a number of years before working as a Port of Entry officer for the Colorado Department of Transportation.
He was a member of the Morgan Church of The Nazarene and the Morgan County Moose Lodge No. 1857. He enjoyed spending time with his family, fishing, camping, boating, woodworking and bowling. He was an avid Denver Bronco fan.
Gosselink is survived by his wife, Joanne Gosselink of Brush; his mother, Wilma Gosselink of Denver; two sons, Mark Gosselink of Gilbert, Ariz., and Matthew Gosselink of Pepria, Ariz.; three daughters, Amy Gosselink of Sioux Falls, S.D., and Jontel Reyman and Jackie Reyman, both of Brush; one sister, Linda Lambott of Englewood; two brothers, Ken Gosselink of Mesa, Ariz., and Rick Gosselink of Aurora, and five grandchildren.
He was preceded in death by his father.
Visitation will be Thursday from 5 to 8 p.m. at the Heer Mortuary in Brush.
Funeral services held Friday, August 24th at 10 a.m. in the Morgan Church of The Nazarene, 221 W. Seventh Ave., Fort Morgan. Interment followed in the Brush Memorial Cemetery.
Friends may make memorial donations to the American Lung Association, 5600 Greenwood Plaza Blvd. Ste. 100, Greenwood Tillage, 80111. The Heer Mortuary & Crematory in Brush is in charge of arrangements.”

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Obituary Of Perry H. Knowlton, August 17, 2007

“Perry H. Knowlton
KNOWLTON, Perry H.– Renowned literary agent and the former Chairman and CEO of Curtis Brown, Ltd., one of the world´s oldest literary agencies, died on July 6, 2007 at the New York State Veterans´ Home at Montrose in Westchester County, after a long and valiant battle with Alzheimer´s disease. He was 80 years old. Born at Miss Lippincott´s Lying-In Hospital in New York City on March 25, 1927, he grew up in Rye, New York. Among his childhood cohort was a young Barbara Pierce, later Barbara Bush. Upon graduating from Phillips Exeter Academy, he served in the army from 1945 to 1946. Adventurous from a young age, at 19 Knowlton and a friend crossed the Atlantic from New York to England in a 21-foot sailboat. He returned to the United States to a comparatively more settled existence as a member of Princeton´s class of 1949, but his continued peripatetic nature is apparent from his roundabout journey to the center of the New York literary world. After a stint as an English teacher at the Lawrenceville School in New Jersey, he took a job in regional sales for the college textbook division of Charles Scribner´s Publishers, initially in Cincinnati and then in Tucson. Knowlton married Louisa C. Tripp in 1954 and finally reached Gotham in 1956. He took a job as an editor at Scribner´s, where he stayed for several years before moving into the world of agenting in 1959, when he was hired by Alan Collins, the president of Curtis Brown, Ltd. Knowlton ran the agency´s book department and in 1968, following Collins´s death, became President and owner of the firm. He personally represented dozens of authors and their estates, a veritable Who´s-Who of 20th Century literature, including W.H. Auden, Daphne DuMaurier, Robertson Davies, Ogden Nash, Ayn Rand, Diana Gabaldon, Tony Hillerman, Frank Robinson, Jean Craighead George, Betty Friedan, Nicholas Monsarrat, Samuel Eliot Morison, A.A. Milne, Frederik Pohl, Harrison Salisbury, Frederick Forsythe, Brian Moore, Pauline Kael, Louis Auchincloss, John Knowles, C. S. Lewis, and Alvin and Heidi Toffler. He also represented Svetlana Alliluyeva, the daughter of Joseph Stalin, after her defection in 1967. He worked fiercely to protect author´s rights and interests, and served on the executive board of the Society of Authors´ Representatives for more than 20 years. He was one of the principal engineers in bringing about the merger of the SAR with the Independent Literary Agents Association to form the Association of Author´s Representatives in 1991 and served as its President from 1993 to 1995. Perry Knowlton was known for his keen intellect, courtly manners, and good looks. He was a handsome man–more than a man of letters ever needed to be. As a sideline in the late 1950´s and early 1960´s, while still practicing as an agent, he modeled for print and TV advertising for Xerox and Budweiser, among others. Most notably, he was one of the original "Marlboro Men". He was also one of the founding members of the Friends of the Earth in 1969, along with former Sierra Club president David Brower. In 1995, several years before fully retiring from his agency practice at Curtis Brown, he returned to his boyhood interest in falconry, describing himself, at the age of 68, as "the world´s oldest apprentice to a falconer." After becoming a fully-licensed falconer he also became a wildlife rehabilitator, and eventually provided a home to 28 birds of prey. In addition to literary agent, teacher, falconer, editor, actor and model, his other occupations and hobbies included life-long sailor, horseman, athlete, licensed airplane pilot, navigator, certified scuba diver, beekeeper, farmer and chef. Divorced in 1961, he is survived by his three children, Timothy Knowlton, Elizabeth Knowlton McNamara and Virginia Knowlton Canfield, along with three grandchildren, Heather, Perry and Alexis, many nieces and nephews, and innumerable friends, clients and colleagues who will miss him forever. A memorial service will be held in the fall.”

Published in the New York Times from 8/17/2007 - 8/19/2007.

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Funeral Of Robert William "Bob" Byorth, April 2, 2007,
Saint Brendan Church, Hilliard
With burial in Resurrection Cemetery, Columbus, Ohio

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Bob at 73 was the youngest of the three Byorth boys but an older brother to Catherine Mary who died at the age of 25 in 1969. Our parents died previously: Floyd +1969 at the age of 72, and Euphemia "Faye" +1984 at the age of 78.
Bob and Janice, true to their conservative background, were very faithful to their Catholic Faith. True to their faith they had good friends and practiced a wonderful hospitality while maintaining an active relationship with their five sons and daughters and their families. The grandchildren (16) miss their grandpa who was one of their greatest fans and mentor. His presence at their games and activities is sorely missed.

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Obituary for
Robert William "Bob" Byorth

“Robert W. Byorth, age 72, of Hilliard, passed away Wednesday, March 28, 2007. Graduate of Carroll College, Helen, MT. Served in the U.S. Navy 1956-1960. Member of Knights of Columbus, St. Brendan's Parish, St. Brendan's Athletic Association and former member of St. Brendan Parish Council. He was a former Bishop Watterson High School Board President, he coached and volunteered in the Hilliard Optimist Youth League and Hilliard Baseball and Softball Associations. Preceded in death by parents Floyd P. and Euphemia T. Byorth and sister Catherine M. Byorth. Survived by loving wife of 49 years Janice A. (Blindauer), children, Steven M. (Lori) Byorth, Brian P. (Winona) Byorth, Douglas J. (Beth) Byorth, Elizabeth A. (Steve) Ford, and Catherine T. (Adam) Tinkler, 14 grandchildren and brothers James Paul Byorth of St. Louis and John Patrick Byorth, MD of Billings, MT. Friends may call 2-4 and 6-8 pm Sunday at the TIDD FUNERAL HOME, 5265 Norwich St., Hilliard. Mass of Christian burial will be held 11 am Monday at St. Brendan Catholic Church, 4475 Dublin Rd., Hilliard, with Father Rodric DiPietro,Father Steve Virginia, and Father Kevin Lutz, Celebrants. Interment Resurrection Cemetery. In lieu of flowers memorial contributions may be made to St. Brendan's for Tuition Assistance.”

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Members of Bob's Notre Dame Class of 1953

Donald Bauer; Alice Biever; Delbert Black; Janice Blindauer; Patty Boeckman; Patricia Brown; Robert Byorth; Shirley Clustka; Angela Clark; Loretta Coyne; Patricia Crawford; Sheila Crawford; Alice Dickinson; Doris Erpenbach; Donna Mae Freidel; Willowdean Fallon; Douglas Hosking; Pauline Harris; Ellsworth Harris; James Iliff; Patricia Irwin; Mary Kippes; Eva Lou Kousman; Patty Lynde; Larry Madden; Mary Lyons; Regina Meals; Janette Metzger; Madonna Morgan, Mary Murphy; James Navin; John Navin; Bernice Oberembt; Arlis Osen; Jacqueline Pflepsen; Nealene Rogan; Mary Alice Roach; Doris Rowe; James Ryan; Joan Sargent; John Sargent; Robert Schlimgen; Stanley Schirmer; Milton Schmida; Jacqueline Shea; James Shelby; Margaret Sibson; Rita Stemper; Denis Thurman; Betty Vondra; Doris Weber; Ronnie Volz; Sylvester Weber; Maynard Wellner; Alvin Wermers; Mary Wermers; John Young;

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Obituary of Wanda Wellner Peck, Notre Dame High School Class of 1949

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“Wanda M. Peck, 75, died December 26, 2006 at Avera McKennan Hospital in Sioux Falls. Wanda was born August 28, 1931 in Mitchell, SD to Robert and Cecelia (Claude) Wellner. She attended school at Mitchell Notre Dame, graduating in 1949. She then went to Presentation college in Aberdeen, graduating with a Nursing Degree in 1953.
She worked at both hospitals in Rapid City, SD. On September 12, 1953 she married Leonard Peck in Mitchell, SD. After her children were born, she stayed home to raise them. Leonard preceded her in death on December, 2000.
They had lived in Rapid City, SD, Sioux Falls, SD and Omaha, NE., with Wanda returning to Sioux Fall, SD in 2001. Wanda was a former member of Christ the King Catholic Church Altar Society, a preparer of the altar linens. She was also a past member of the south Dakota Nurses Association.
Wanda is survived by her mother, Cecelia Wellner, Mitchell, SD; sons, Kim (Diana) Stanley, New Mexico, Leonard (Lisa), Surf Side, TX and Don, Omaha, NE; daughters, Tami (James) Bennett, LaGrange, IN, Valari (Dale) Beaner, Hartford, SD, Renee Peck, Sioux Falls, SD, Mary (Randy) Peck, Sioux Falls, SD, Tina (Giang) Roberts, Omaha, NE; brother, Maynard (Marian) Wellner, Tucson, AZ; sister, Judy (Don) Blindauer, Mitchell, SD; special friend, Delores Kangley, Sioux falls, SD; 21 grandchildren and 9 great- grandchildren; numerous nieces and nephews. She was preceded in death by her father and husband.”

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Obituary of Father Ted Gustin, Class of 1957

“The Rev. Theodore F. Gustin, 75, died Dec. 27, 2006, at St. Vincent´s Care Center, Bismarck. Services will be held at noon Tuesday, Jan. 2, 2007, at Church of St. Mary, Bismarck, with the Rev. Paul A. Zipfel officiating.
Visitation will be held from 5 to 9 p.m. Monday at Church of St. Mary, where a vigil service will be held at 7 p.m. Visitation will continue one hour prior to services at the church.
The Rev. Gustin was born Dec. 4, 1931, at Flasher, the son of Fred and Katherine (Eckroth) Gustin. He was raised in Flasher, where he attended grade school for seven years and high school for one year. He attended three years of high school and two years of college at Crosier Seminary, Onamia, Minn. He attended St. John´s University, Collegeville, Minn., from 1949 to 1951 and St. Paul Seminary, St. Paul, Minn., from 1951 to 1957. He received a bachelor´s degree in philosophy from St. Paul Seminary, in 1953.
The Rev. Gustin was ordained a priest for the Diocese of Bismarck at Cathedral of the Holy Spirit, Bismarck, on June 2, 1957, by the Most Rev. Hilary B. Hacker.
The Rev. Gustin´s first assignment in the Diocese of Bismarck was an assistant pastor at the Church of St. Joseph, Mandan, from 1957 to 1963. He then became a Tribunal student at the Boston Chancery from October 1963 to June 1964. The Rev. Gustin was appointed pastor of the Church of the Sacred Heart, Wilton, and its mission, the Church of St. Ignatius, Wing, from 1964 to 1974. He was appointed vice officialis for Diocese of Bismarck Tribunal and served in that capacity from August 1964 to August 1978.
The Rev. Gustin was appointed assistant pastor at the Church of St. Mary, Bismarck, from 1974 to 1981, and in August 1978 was appointed officialis for the Diocese of Bismarck and served as officialis until July 1985. In September 1981, he was appointed pastor at the Church of St. Mary, Bismarck, until 1988. He then took a sabbatical at St. John´s University for three months.
He was appointed interim director for the Propagation of Faith from December 1988 to July 1989. He served as parish administrator of the Church of St. Vincent de Paul, Crown Butte, from January to April 1989, and as assistant to the director for the Office of Vocations from December 1988 to July 1989. He also served as acting judicial vicar for the Tribunal from January to April 1989, and as vicar for the Permanent Diaconate from July 1989 to July 1999. In July 1989, the Rev. Gustin was appointed pastor of the Church of St. Henry, Regent, where he served until June 1990. He served as judicial vicar for the Tribunal from November 1990 to July 1992. He was appointed pastor of the Church of the Sacred Heart, Wilton, and its missions, the Church of St. Ignatius, Wing, and the Church of St. Edwin, Washburn, in June 1990, where he served until January 2000.
The Rev. Gustin retired and moved to Emmaus Place, Bismarck, in January 2000. He lived at Emmaus Place until he moved to St. Vincent´s Care Center.
He is survived by his sisters, Rose Uhlman, Nevada, Anne Stack, Wyoming, Blondina Pfau, Wyoming, and Pat Heard, Texas; his brother, Al Gustin, California; his sister-in-law, Polly Gustin, Bismarck; and numerous nieces and nephews.
He was preceded in death by his parents; his sisters, Ida Mullins, Margaret Wingerter, Pauline Laney and Agnes Martin; and his brothers, Leo and Albert.”

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Obituary for Father Thomas J. McPhillips

Mitchell Daily Republic.
Rev. Thomas McPhillips, Mitchell
“The Rev. Thomas J. McPhillips, 92, Mitchell, died Sunday, Nov. 5, 2006, at Avera Brady Home, Mitchell.
Funeral services will be at 10:30 a.m. Friday at St. James Catholic Church, Chamberlain,
ing. Burial will be in St. Anthony Catholic Cemetery, Pukwana. Visitation will begin at 4 p.m. Thursday at the church with a 7 p.m. Scripture/rosary service at the church, with the Knights of Columbus assisting.
Arrangements are under the direction of Hickey-Wevik Funeral Chapel, Chamberlain.
He was born on Oct. 5, 1914, in Mobile, Ala., to Harry and Anna McPhillips.
He was educated in Catholic schools in Mobile before entering the Jesuit community for several years.
He left the Jesuits to study at Fordham University and was accepted as a seminarian for Sioux Falls in 1941.
He completed his studies at St. Paul Seminary and was ordained to the priesthood at St. Joseph Cathedral on Dec. 17, 1944.
He served as assistant pastor at Holy Family Catholic Church, Mitchell, on his first assignment. He stayed in that position until October 1948, when he was named administrator of St. James, Chamberlain, with missions of Pukwana and Red Lake.
He was the founding pastor of Holy Spirit Catholic Church.
In 1968, he was named pastor of St. Martin, Huron, where he served until 1970, when he was reappointed to St. James and St. Anthony churches in Chamberlain and Pukwana, respectively.
In 1981, he moved to Elkton and Aurora and stayed there until his retirement in 1990.
He has served as chaplain at Brady Home for the past 16 years.
He also served as a diocesan consultor and member of the Priest Personnel Board.
He is survived by two sisters: Henrietta Kemp, North Port, Ala.; and Ann Raffaelli, Texarkana, Texas; and many nieces and nephews.
He was preceded in death by his parents, two brothers: Henry and Arthur; and two sisters: Anna Mary Grace and Martha McPhillips.
In lieu of flowers, memorials may be directed to the Priest Retirement Fund.”

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“Thought those of you who knew him, would enjoy this article about Father McPhillips.
The Rev. Thomas J. McPhillips, Mitchell, who died last week at age 92, did something nice for his mourners: He bought them a drink.
"After the funeral, but before the cemetery, everyone was invited to eat prime rib at Cedar Shore," said Darren Hickey, Chamberlain, who handled the funeral at St. James Parish.
When they arrived, they also received a drink ticket. "As they came in the door, everyone who wanted one had a drink and shared a few moments, then they went on in to the tables that were set up for lunch," said Hickey.
Father Mac started working on this years ago, Hickey said, and was back in Chamberlain again in February to go over the details.
I´ve heard about the deceased reaching out from the grave, but this was an unusual, though not totally surprising approach, knowing Father Mac.”
-- nhamiel@mitchellrepublic.com --

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Sixtieth Anniversary of Ordination,
August 25, 2004

“Father Thomas J. McPhillips; Birth date: October 5,1914; Ordination to the Priesthood: December 17,1944. Father Thomas J. McPhillips celebrated his 60th year of ordination to the priesthood on August 25, 2004. Fr. Thomas "T.J." McPhillips was born October 5, 1914, in Mobile, Alabama. He was ordained at St. Joseph Cathedral on December 17, 1944. Father McPhillips began his service in the diocese as an assistant pastor at Holy Family Parish in Mitchell. He also served as administrator of St. James Church in Chamberlain. Father McPhillips was the founding pastor of Holy Spirit Parish in Mitchell. He also served in Huron and Elkton before retiring from active parish service in 1990. Father McPhillips continues to serve as chaplain of the Avera Brady Home in Mitchell.

The parishes of Holy Spirit and Holy Family in Mitchell invited the public to a Mass of Celebration on Wednesday, August 25, 2004, at 6:00pm at Holy Spirit Church with a public reception following in the John Paul II Gym.

This is a privilege for all of us to take part in the celebration of Fr. Thomas J. "Mac" McPhillips's 60th anniversary of Ordination to the Priesthood.

We are pleased to hold this celebration in the Holy Spirit Church, the Church he began to build. I am thankful to God for placing Fr. Mac in a part of my priestly journey. For over three years he is my inspiration and motivation in my priestly work. Here is one little story that indicates Fr. Mac's commitment to his priestly vocation: Once I overheard his telephone conversation with his nephew from Texas. His nephew asked him to come for a short vacation and rest to his home in Texas. Fr. Mac, sitting on his wheelchair answered decisively: "Can't find any substitute!"

On behalf of Holy Spirit Parish, I offer him our love and appreciation! May God continue to bless you on your 60th anniversary of ordination and always!”
– Fr. Andrew Swietochowski

– A Family Tribute to Fr. Tom McPhillips

“It certainly was different growing up with an uncle who just happened to be a priest Fr. Tom McPhillips is a man of God but to his numerous nieces and nephews he is just plain "Uncle Tom". Tom is the middle child of Harry and Anna McPhillips and he is the glue that holds the family together.
He found himself Father Confessor to some and arbiter for others. He was the peacemaker. He was the foundation. He always seemed to know the right answers and never judged our insecurities or our indiscretions.
But primarily, he was always available for the family, whether it was responding to a family phone call or a family crisis. There wasn't a christening, wedding or death without Uncle Tom in attendance. He even insisted on driving to the cathedral through flooded streets in the middle of a hurricane just to participate in a family wedding.
But the most enjoyable times were the lazy days on Mobile Bay when he would just come and relax. The family would make an event of the occasion with all the kinfolks coming to town from Texas to Florida to Washington, D. C. Mornings would begin with "happy hour" that extended to "happy week". There was always seafood, especially "de-veined" shrimp.
But mostly, it was sharing of stories and enjoying our large, wonderful Irish family. Though we had all grown up and gone our separate paths. Uncle Tom was reason for the family to converge and remember that family is always there for one another...and he has always been there for us.”

--- Sent by Rose McPhillips, P. C.


“Look at the palms of your hands and remember back to that day when your bishop anointed them and sent you forth to love and serve us ...
Remember the plans you had that day for your hands to gather and minister to your people? Think back to the babies your hands have baptized.
Think of the children your hands have prepared for First Communion and Confirmation. Think of the hundreds of homilies your hands have written - carefully chosen words that transformed lives.
Think of the countless times your hands have been held up in blessing and forgiveness in the Sacrament of Reconciliation. Now think of your last Mass, and so many others, when you took plain bread and wine into your hands and changed them into the Body and Blood of Jesus Christ. Think of the hands, our hands, into which you placed His Precious Body and the cup of His Precious Blood.
Think of the retreats, the missions, the days and nights of renewal that your hands have prepared. Think of the people your hands have gathered and touched and sent forth from these experiences with a new understanding and love for each other and for our Catholic Church.
Think of the times your hands have reached out and grasped others in a prayer circle of love. Think of the hands, young and nervous, which your hands have joined in the Sacrament of Matrimony. Think of the sick in mind and body that have come to you seeking help and left with hope alive in their hearts again. Think ot the dying bodies your hands have anointed into Paradise.
Today, we anoint your hands anew with our love, with the love of your entire Catholic family. If ever in the days ahead, you feel lonely and discouraged, please remember these words. Please hold up your hands and look at them, and remember how they fed us the Bread of Life. How they brought hope back into our lives, how they comforted us, healed us and welcomed us home to our Church again.
We wish we could take you by the hands of the Sacrament of Holy Orders. We reverence them and we cannot live our lives without them, without you.
Thank you for faithfully loving and serving us. We are so proud that you are our beloved priest.”
-- Author Unknown

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The following is a clever way to encourage more people to complete a Stewardship Intention Card. Follow it up with detailed information about when they will receive the Intention Card and when they are to return it.
Obituary

“Our parish was saddened to learn this week of the death of one of our most valued members. Someone Else. Someone's passing creates a vacancy that will be difficult to fill. Else has been with us for many years and for every one of those years, Someone did far more than a normal person's share of the work. Whenever there was a job to do or a meeting to attend, one name was on everyone's list, "Let Someone Else do it." Whenever leadership was mentioned, this wonderful person was looked to for inspiration as well as results: "Someone Else can lead that project." It was common knowledge that Someone Else was among the most liberal givers in our parish. Whenever there was a financial need, everyone just assumed Someone Else would make up the difference. Someone Else was a wonderful person; sometimes appearing superhuman. Were the truth known, everybody expected too much of Someone Else. Now Someone Else is gone! We wonder what we are going to do. Someone Else left a wonderful example to follow, but who is going to follow it? Who is going to do the things Someone Else did? When you are asked to help this year, remember - we can't depend on Someone Else anymore.” -Author Unknown

“Fr. William J. Deering O'56 ('44-56, '69), a priest of the Diocese of Evansville who was well known as an educator, musician and liturgist, died October 14 (2005) in Evansville at the age of 75. He studied at Saint Meinrad from 1944-56.
Fr. Deering was ordained May 26,1956, by Bishop Henry Grimmelsman, the first bishop of the Diocese of Evansville. He taught high school religion at Mater Dei in Evansville, and at Washington Catholic High School in Washington, IN. He served the diocese as director of worship and as director of the permanent diaconate. He was pastor at several parishes within the diocese. His last assignment was as pastor emeritus of St. Bernard Parish in Snake Run, IN.
Fr. Deering was well known at Saint Meinrad for his years of service to his alma mater. He served 18 years on the Alumni Association Board of Directors and twice was elected the board's president. He assisted with Saint Meinrad College's "Sounds of Spring" program and was a highlight at each summer's student orientation program.
Most alumni knew Fr. Deering as the leader of the choir at the annual Alumni Reunions. He also played an active role in beginning the Alumni Association biennial tours. His service will be long remembered.”

As reported in the Winter issue of the Saint Meinrad Alumni publication, 'On The Hill' Volume 45:1.

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Just For Older Citizens on Julie Andrew's 69th

Courtesy of Robert Byorth

To commemorate her 69th birthday on October 1, actress/vocalist Julie Andrews made a special appearance at Manhattan's Radio City Music Hall Julie for the benefit of the AARP. One of the musical numbers she performed was "My Favorite Things" from the legendary movie "Sound Of Music." However, the lyrics of the song were deliberately changed for the entertainment of her "blue hair" audience. Here are the lyrics she recited:

Maalox and nose drops and needles for knitting,
Walkers and handrails and new dental fittings,
Bundles of magazines tied up in string,
These are a few of my favorite things.

Cadillacs and cataracts and hearing aids and glasses,
Polident and Fixodent and false teeth in glasses,
Pacemakers, golf carts and porches with swings,
These are a few of my favorite things.
When the pipes leak,

When the bones creak,
When the knees go bad,
I simply remember my favorite things,
And then I don't feel so bad.

Hot tea and crumpets, and corn pads for bunions,
No spicy hot food or food cooked with onions,
Bathrobes and heat pads and hot meals they bring,
These are a few of my favorite things.

Back pains, confused brains, and no fear of sinnin',
Thin bones and fractures and hair that is thinnin',
And we won't mention our short shrunken frames,
When we remember our favorite things.

When the joints ache, when the hips break,
When the eyes grow dim,
Then I remember the great life I've had,
And then I don't feel so bad.

Ms. Andrews received a standing ovation from the crowd that lasted over four minutes and repeated encores.

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DeCASTRO, MARCIAL P., baptized into the hope of Christ's resurrection, Tues., Aug. 2, 2005; beloved husband of Santa M. DeCastro (nee Mirabella); dear father and father-in-law of Maria (Deirk) Feiner, Pamela (Steve) Appell and Marc (Wanda) DeCastro; dear grandfather of Jonathan, James, Evan, Mitchell, Nicholas, Lauren and Noah; our dear brother-in-law, uncle, cousin and friend. Funeral from the ORTMANN-STIPANOVICH Funeral Home, 12444 Olive Blvd., Creve Coeur, Sat., Aug. 6, 9:30 a.m. to St. Monica Church, for 10 a.m. Mass. Interment Resurrection. Donations to Youthbridge Family Community, 12685 Olive Blvd., Creve Coeur, MO 63141 or St. Vincent DePaul Society appreciated. Visitation from 3-8, Friday.

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I was born on Father's Day in 1968. Having two young sons of my own, I can only imagine the joy that my dad felt when he finally got "his boy". My dad was an interesting character - often misunderstood, but seldom unspoken. As a matter of fact, he spoke to me last night in a dream and said "This is all George Bush's fault!." Yes, you may have known that my father was not very fond of our current leader - but I think that is just his way of challenging people. I live in Boston, the hotbed of liberal thinking and I often wonder if my dad had settled in liberal Massachusetts would he have been a staunch conservative? Perhaps. You see, my dad always wanted people to think for themselves and he challenged us to do our best. People may not have recognized what he was doing. For example, he taught me to swim by chasing me off a diving board over 12 feet of water and told me to swim to the side of the pool. With Pam, he often tried to embarrass her in front of her dates with colorful comments or outlandish behavior. And with Maria, he used her at 8 years old to install a window air conditioner unit on the second floor of our apartment (she did most of the heavy lifting). An outsider may have thought to call the department of social services - but we all know that he was challenging us in each of those instances to excel - do more - and not settle. This was a man who could describe the different periods of Monet, describe Frank Lloyd Wright architecture in great detail, and still recite word from word Disorder In the Court, a classic Three Stooges short. So dad, I will continue your tradition of challenging my own children and those around me. I will also continue watching Fox News, listening to country music and rooting for the Cardinals and Red Sox. I am sure that will only mean that my children will be watching CNN, listening to Rap and rooting for the Cubs and Yankees - the challenge continues&133.

Papoo was a very nice guy to hang around with. He would always make everyone laugh. The best thing about Papoo was that he taught you to never give up in anything even if it was almost impossible. He always played games with us and taught us how to play most of those games. He told us stories about history. He also taught us new games that we had never played before, and they were always fun.

Papoo is always so happy, kind and fun. That he's the guy that you want to be like and be friends with. We all loved Papoo very much and he loved us all too.

Bye,

Evan, Mitchell and Lauren

Our Dad died without us having a chance to say good bye. So these are some things we want to thank him for giving to us.

First, we would like to thank him for sharing with everyone his sense of humor. As offensive as it could occasionally be, we, our kids and friends truly enjoyed it.

Second, we wanted to thank him for giving us such colorful language. Although it wasn't always in good taste it showed that he was a man who felt EVERYTHING deeply. His anger, his love, his frustration, and his passion for the world.

We also want to thank him for teaching us to QUESTION everything. After a conversation with him, you would often look at things in a new way.

Next we want to thank him for 'BUILDING OUR CHARACTER' which even at this difficult time, we know he is up in heaven saying, “This is good for you, it builds character.”

Lastly we want to thank him for giving us the deepest and strongest love. We know we were his greatest accomplishment. He never hesitated to tell us that he was proud of us.

Thank you also for making such an effort to be part of our lives over the past few years. We are so grateful for the time we got to have with you.

We will miss you daddy.

Love,

Riah Pia and Lamper

Memorial Service for Marcial, October 20, 2005

Musical Introduction by Amy Camie, Harpist
Welcome by Sr. Dotty Clark
Marcial volunteered at the St. John Medical Center's
Cancer Building Information Desk on Friday mornings.
Reading of the 23rd Psalm Revisited by Jeanine Derler

“On his arrival, Jesus found that Lazarus had already been in the tomb for four days. Bethany was less than two miles from Jerusalem, and many Jews had come to Martha and Mary to comfort them in the loss of their brother. When Martha heard that Jesus was coming, she went out to meet him, but Mary stayed at home.
"Lord," Martha said to Jesus, "if you had been here, my brother would not have died. "But I know that even now God will give you whatever you ask."
“Jesus said to her, "Your brother will rise again.” Martha answered, “I know he will rise again in the resurrection at the last day.” Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will live, even though he dies; and whoever lives and believes in me will never die. Do you believe this?”

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Ben Stein's Last Column, June 6, 2005

6 June 2005 Ben Stein's Last Column... For many years Ben Stein has written a biweekly column called "Monday Night At Morton's." (Morton's is a famous chain of Steakhouses known to be frequented by movie stars and famous people from around the globe.) Now, Ben is terminating the column to move on to other things in his life. Reading his final column is worth a few minutes of your time.
Ben Stein's Last Column...
How Can Someone Who Lives in Insane Luxury Be a Star in Today's World?
As I begin to write this, I "slug" it, as we writers say, which means I put a heading on top of the document to identify it. This heading is "eonlineFINAL," and it gives me a shiver to write it. I have been doing this column for so long that I cannot even recall when I started. I loved writing this column so much for so long I came to believe it would never end.
It worked well for a long time, but gradually, my changing as a person and the world's change have overtaken it. On a small scale, Morton's, while better than ever, no longer attracts as many stars as it used to. It still brings in the rich people in droves and definitely some stars. I saw Samuel L. Jackson there a few days ago, and we had a nice visit, and right before that, I saw and had a splendid talk with Warren Beatty in an elevator, in which we agreed that Splendor in the Grass was a super movie. But Morton's is not the star galaxy it once was, though it probably will be again.
Beyond that, a bigger change has happened. I no longer think Hollywood stars are terribly important. They are uniformly pleasant, friendly people, and they treat me better than I deserve to be treated. But a man or woman who makes a huge wage for memorizing lines and reciting them in front of a camera is no longer my idea of a shining star we should all look up to.
How can a man or woman who makes an eight-figure wage and lives in insane luxury really be a star in today's world, if by a "star" we mean someone bright and powerful and attractive as a role model? Real stars are not riding around in the backs of limousines or in Porsches or getting trained in yoga or Pilates and eating only raw fruit while they have Vietnamese girls do their nails.
They can be interesting, nice people, but they are not heroes to me any longer. A real star is the soldier of the 4th Infantry Division who poked his head into a hole on a farm near Tikrit, Iraq. He could have been met by a bomb or a hail of AK-47 bullets. Instead, he faced an abject Saddam Hussein and the gratitude of all of the decent people of the world.
A real star is the U.S. soldier who was sent to disarm a bomb next to a road north of Baghdad. He approached it, and the bomb went off and killed him.
A real star, the kind who haunts my memory night and day, is the U.S. soldier in Baghdad who saw a little girl playing with a piece of unexploded ordnance on a street near where he was guarding a station. He pushed her aside and threw himself on it just as it exploded. He left a family desolate in California and a little girl alive in Baghdad.
The stars who deserve media attention are not the ones who have lavish weddings on TV but the ones who patrol the streets of Mosul even after two of their buddies were murdered and their bodies battered and stripped for the sin of trying to protect Iraqis from terrorists.
We put couples with incomes of $100 million a year on the covers of our magazines. The noncoms and officers who barely scrape by on military pay but stand on guard in Afghanistan and Iraq and on ships and in submarines and near the Arctic Circle are anonymous as they live and die.
I am no longer comfortable being a part of the system that has such poor values, and I do not want to perpetuate those values by pretending that who is eating at Morton's is a big subject.
There are plenty of other stars in the American firmament...the policemen and women who go off on patrol in South Central and have no idea if they will return alive; the orderlies and paramedics who bring in people who have been in terrible accidents and prepare them for surgery; the teachers and nurses who throw their whole spirits into caring for autistic children; the kind men and women who work in hospices and in cancer wards.
Think of each and every fireman who was running up the stairs at the World Trade Center as the towers began to collapse. Now you have my idea of a real hero.
I came to realize that life lived to help others is the only one that matters. This is my highest and best use as a human. I can put it another way. Years ago, I realized I could never be as great an actor as Olivier or as good a comic as Steve Martin...or Martin Mull or Fred Willard--or as good an economist as Samuelson or Friedman or as good a writer as Fitzgerald. Or even remotely close to any of them.
But I could be a devoted father to my son, husband to my wife and, above all, a good son to the parents who had done so much for me. This came to be my main task in life. I did it moderately well with my son, pretty well with my wife and well indeed with my parents (with my sister's help). I cared for and paid attention to them in their declining years. I stayed with my father as he got sick, went into extremis and then into a coma and then entered immortality with my sister and me reading him the Psalms. This was the only point at which my life touched the lives of the soldiers in Iraq or the firefighters in New York. I came to realize that life lived to help others is the only one that matters and that it is my duty, in return for the lavish life God has devolved upon me, to help others He has placed in my path. This is my highest and best use as a human.
Faith is not believing that God can. It is knowing that God will.
By Ben Stein

Courtesy of Karen Schneider and Source

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Death of Marie A. Donnelly

“FAIRBANK - Marie A. Donnelly, 89, died Monday morning, June 13, 2005, at University Hospitals in Iowa City, from complications following surgery.
Funeral Mass will be 10:30 a.m. Thursday, June 16, at Immaculate Conception Catholic Church, Fairbank, with the Rev. Kenneth Stecher officiating. Burial will be in the church cemetery.
Friends may call from 3 until 8 p.m. Wednesday, at Woods Funeral Home, Fairbank, with a 3:30 p.m. rosary and 7 p.m. scripture service.
Marie was born Nov. 13, 1915, at Hazleton, the daughter of Robert Francis and Mary (Michels) Burke. She married John Donnelly on April 14, 1937, at St. Mary's Catholic Church in Hazleton. Marie retired from City Laundering Company in Oelwein, and was also a homemaker.
Survivors include two sons, John (Marita) Donnelly of Battle Creek, Mich., and Jim (Marilyn) Donnelly of Omaha, NE; four grandchildren; two sisters, Loyola (Norbert) Kleitsch and Roberta (LeRoy) Clements, both of Fairbank; and one brother, Leonard Burke of Oelwein.
She was preceded in death by her parents; her husband, John in 1969; three sisters, Virginia, Verona and Bernice; and two brothers, Raymond and Maurice Burke.
Memorials in her name may be directed to Immaculate Conception Catholic Church.”

In Memory of
Marie A. Donnelly
Born November 13, 1915
Entered Into Rest June 13, 2005
Scripture Service June 15, 2005 at 7:00 P.M.
Mass of the Resurrection
Thursday, June 16, 2005 o 10:30 A.M.
Immaculate Conception Catholic Church
Fairbank, Iowa
Officiating: Rev. Kenneth Stecher
Lector: Jean Galleger
Gift Bearers: Grandchildren
Cantor: Kim Weepie
Eucharistic Minister: Marilyn Donnelly
Organist: Roxanne Erhardt
Music: Immaculate Conception Choir
Casket Bearers:
Pat Burke Bill Burke Mike Burke
Tom Kleitsch Pat Shannon Junior Lemph
Interment
Immaculate Conception Cemetery
Fairbank, Iowa

I'M FREE

“Don't grieve for me, for now I'm free,
I'm following the path God laid for me.
I took His hand when I heard Him call,
I turned my back and left it all.
I could not stay another day,
To laugh, to love, to work or play.
Tasks left undone must stay that way.
I found that peace at the close of day.

If my parting has left a void,
Then fill it with remembered joy.
A friendship shared, a laugh, a kiss,
Ah yes, these things 1 too will miss.
Be not burdened with times of sorrow,
I wish you the sunshine of tomorrow.
My life's been full, I've savored much,
Good friends, good times, a loved one's touch.

Perhaps my time seemed all too brief,
Don't lengthen it now with undue grief,
Lift up your heart and share with me,
God wanted me now; He set me free.
Woods Funeral Home – Fairbank, Iowa”

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Death of Dottie B. Siempelkamp

Thursday, January 20, 2005; wife of the late L.W. 'Bill' Siempelkamp; dear mother of Darby Siempelkamp and Paige Siempelkamp; mother-in-law of Michael Kresser and Donald Penny, dear grandmother of Luke, Recce, Brennan and Remy Kresser and Sam Penny; sister of Martha ' Van Leuven; sister-in-law, aunt and great aunt.
Dottie was a life long resident of Kirkwood a 20 year employee of the City of Kirkwood and retired in 1985 as the Director of Parks and Recreation. Dottie was a force of nature, passionate in all things. Full of life, love and opinions and a friend to all of us.
Visitation will be held Sunday, January 23 from 2-5 p.m. at Bopp Chapel, 10610 Manchester Rd., Kirkwood. A private family service will be held on Monday. In lieu of flowers, memorials are preferred to UN1CEF or to a charity of one's choice.”

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“Dottie Siempelkamp died the way she lived her life - on her own terms. The night before her passing, Dottie, a life-long Democrat, ranted and raved about George W. Bush's inauguration, saying that if she had her way and were present in the audience, she would stand and turn her back in protest. Well, in deciding to die on his inaugural day, she did just that. Dottie lived in Kirkwood for 86 years and it was an accepted fact that, if you lived in Kirkwood, you either knew her personally or knew of her. When Terri Smith Alien, her next-door neighbor and close family friend told friends she was moving to Van Buren Avenue in Kirkwood, they asked, "Next to Dottie?" In looking back on Dottie's long life, it seems there was reason for her notoriety. She was born on December 25,1918, to Norma and Lurton Akard who lived at 542 N. Clay Avenue in Kirkwood. Lurton was a long-time employee of the City of Kirkwood and director, for many years, of the City's Electric Department. Norma was an early suffragette whose strong personality and opinions on everything from sports to politics, were passed on, full strength, to their first child, Dorothy, Dottie, as she was known. As a child, Dottie suffered from rheumatic and scarlet fevers, which left her with a weak heart. Norma and Lurton feared she was too sickly for regular school and thought, however briefly, about home-schooling Dottie. But Dottie had other plans; not only did she go to Kirkwood Public Schools, she managed to stay in the Kirkwood school system longer than most other students, graduating from Kirkwood High School at the age of 21. When asked why it took her so long to get a diploma, Dottie would reply, "The teachers didn't understand me. I wasn't stupid, just spirited." And spirited, she was. When Dottie was asked to leave Nipher for misbehaving, Norma and Lurton sent her to The Principia and other St. Louis area private schools. But even well-financed private school administrators couldn't contain her energy and exuberance for all things creative and out-of- bounds. Fortunately, she managed, always, to get asked back into the Kirkwood schools, thanks in large part to her father's generous contributions. His patience and investment paid off and Dottie graduated in 1939, last in her class but with a diploma in hand. After a brief stint at Washington University (she was an art major, but didn't like the idea of drawing nude figures), she went to work at Rice Stix in the advertising department. Dottie wasn't crazy about the work, but she loved making a fashion statement in her tweed suit and spectator shoes, getting on the train in Kirkwood, and heading downtown each day. It was, after all, during World War II, and there were many social activities surrounding the war effort. With her deep, Ella Fitzgerald-type voice, she was often asked to sing with local bands. And sing she did until a lifelong passion for Camel cigarettes got the best of her voice. In 1947, she married L.W. "Bill" Siempelkamp, a handsome WWII veteran who, she told her friends, looked like Errol Flynn and had a kindness, generosity, and affection for the underdog that she admired. Bill and Dottie married, moved into a house at 440 N. Van Buren, and had two daughters, Darby and Paige. Bill worked for H. Kohnstamn and Co., selling food flavor and color, and Dottie became an active volunteer - a room mother at St. Peter's School, a Tri-Hi-Y advisor at the Kirkwood YMCA, a chairman of the Kirkwood Centennial, and a manager of the Noonday Optimist Club Horse Show, Her love for kids led to a part time position with the City of Kirkwood's Parks and Recreation Department where she ran "Teentown," which was located above Color Art on Kirkwood Road next to the City Hall. It was under Dottie's supervision that Teentown became a destination - a gathering spot for teenagers looking for a place to "be" after school - and where, while playing pool, ping pong, or arcade games, Dottie delivered advice, criticism, or general good fun. When Bill died suddenly in 1968, Dottie formed a tight circle around her family that was impenetrable. She brought her parents, Norma and Lurton, to live with her when they couldn't maintain their home, and went to work full time at the Kirkwood Parks and Recreation Department to support her extended family. She worked long hours as the Youth Director and was promoted to Director of Parks and Recreation, a position she held until her retirement 1985. Her passion for Kirkwood and her job with the Parks and Recreation Department fueled her days, which often started at 4:30 a.m. when she climbed aboard the ice rink's Zamboni and began clearing the ice for the day's first hockey practice. She was one of the first women in the Midwest to drive the massive machine and received a commendation pin from Mr. Zamboni for her mastery, The Green Tree Festival Horse Show, which she managed for many years, was a testament to her love of horses, showmanship, and the power of a large event. Even after retiring, she stayed involved with the horse world, volunteering at the St. Louis Charity Horse Show, rescuing and owning "Angle", a small horse she found starving at a local stable, and joining the St. Louis Carriage Club Association. Although her feelings ran deep, Dottie was a pretty easy read. If she was displeased with you or for some reason just feeling cranky-and she had her reasons-you knew it immediately, from the angle of her glance and the press of her lips, from the blunt commentary or the sarcastic aside. But if you were a friend, she made you feel that no one was more important to her, a gift passed undiluted to her daughters. Throughout her years, her daughters, friends, home, yard, and neighbors, and the Kirkwood community were her passions. And, it was there, sustained by her daughters' monthly visits from San Francisco and New York and by the kinship of all those who stopped by with food or conversation, that she lived a full and active life. To all who knew her, Dottie was a force of nature, unabashed and uncompromising in her love of life and those who shared it with her, an extraordinary woman for whom a trip to the grocery store or an afternoon on the front porch became a celebration of friendships, made and maintained, as were all things, on her own terms.

Dottie was waked Sunday Afternoon, January 23rd, 2005 at Bopp Funeral Home in Kirkwood. A private farewell ceremony was held, January 24th, with burial in Jerseyville.”

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Death of Monsignor James Campbell

“The Catholic Diocese of Peoria mourns the death of Monsignor James Campbell” The Catholic Diocese of Peoria, Illinois announced the death of Msgr. James F. Campbell. Msgr. Campbell passed away the morning of January 24, 2005 at OSF St. Clare Home in Peoria Heights, he was 79 years old. Msgr. Campbell was ordained a priest on June 2, 1957 and served in many capacities throughout the years. Most of his service as a priest was in the city of Peoria, serving as the Pastor at St. Thomas in Peoria Heights and St. Mark's in Peoria. He also worked for many years at Catholic Social Service. He was appointed Vicar General and Chancellor of the Diocese in 1990. He served in those roles until 1999 when was given Senior Priest Status. Additionally in 1999, he was made a Protonotary Apostolic, the highest rank of Monsignor, by Pope John Paul II. Msgr. Campbell also served as Chaplain at Mt. Alverno Novitiate, the Motherhouse in East Peoria and at Immaculate Conception Motherhouse in West Peoria.
Msgr. Campbell knew no strangers and will be remembered for his bright smile, dedication to his priestly work and his love and compassion for all people. He will be sorely missed.
The funeral arrangements for Msgr. James Campbell are as follows: Visitation will be Thursday January 27th 4-8 p.m. at the Immaculate Conception Convent Motherhouse 2408 W. Heading Avenue West Peoria, IL. Rosary will be at 4 p.m. with Scripture Service at 7:30 p.m.
A Funeral Mass will be celebrated at the Cathedral of St. Mary of the Immaculate Conception 607 NE Madison Ave, Peoria at 11:00 a.m. on Friday, January 28th. Visitation will be prior to the mass from 10:00 am -11:00 am. Burial will be at Calvary Cemetery in Rock Island, IL”

Contact Persons: Elizabeth R. Smarjesse, Director of Communications, (309) 671-1550;
Catholic Diocese of Peoria, January 25, 2005

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Funeral Homily for Monsignor James Campbell
by classmate Monsignor E. Edward Higgins

Following are excerpts from the homily at last Friday's funeral Mass for Msgr. James F. Campbell, vicar general and a senior priest of the Diocese of Peoria. The homilist was Msgr. E. Edward Higgins.

Msgr. Campbell-a former pastor, associate director of Catholic Social Service, and chaplain of both the East Peoria and Heading Avenue Franciscans - died Monday, Jan. 24, at the age of 79.
I want to extend my personal sympathy to the family on Jim's death. A reading from Isaiah says that death....seems to be utter destruction. Well, that's the way we feel. But we don't feel that way about Jim.
We have our faith in the resurrection and that gives us the power to overcome the feeling of utter destruction. The second reading from Romans says we die with Christ, we're buried with him, and we rise transformed with him. And so in that way, it's a transformation that goes on to our lives. They tell me that "blessed" can also be translated "happy." We're told in the Gospel, in the Beatitudes, to be happy doing the very things that would seemingly make us unhappy. Blessed are the poor in spirit, blessed are those who mourn, and so forth.
While I was thinking about that this week I thought of Father John Crowley. I was ordained about a year and we were at some gathering and he came up to me and said "Higgins I am worried about you." I said "Why?" He said "You're too happy. You're not living the cross."
I don't know whether I yet understand that or not, but I know Jim lived the cross. He had some great things in his life to overcome. He got shot up in the service, came back and went to school and wanted to be a doctor. And then about seven semesters into school after a chest x-ray he was told he had TB. He had to quit school and go on bed rest for a year. At the end of that year they said, "Gee, you didn't have TB. That scar tissue is from childhood."

Msgr. Campbell lived the cross. He was in daily pain most of his life. But not many people knew that. They didn't know he was suffering because he didn't talk about it. He was happy. Gosh, was he happy.

So in the meantime he changed his mind and wanted to be a priest. He got in touch with the Trappists at New Mallory outside of Dubuque, Iowa, and they said "Get your degree and come on up." And so he went through as a postulant and the novitiate, and while he was in the novitiate he got sick. He went to the hospital and they said, "Boy, you've got TB."

IN THOSE days, back in the late '40s, they did pretty radical surgery. He ended up with one lung collapsed, half of the other one taken out, no ribs on one side, his chest caved in, his left shoulder drooping, curvature of the spine, and two inches shorter than he had been. He dropped down to my size, about five-ten at the time.
The first time I met him was in college. He wanted to be a priest, and we weren't as eager to accept candidates to the priesthood as we are now. (Laughter.) Oh, I mean. . .we didn't want anybody with any diseases or anything like that. So he was rejected.
Finally, Msgr. Jordan came down to Bishop Cousins and pleaded, saying: "If this man goes through, is ordained a priest, and celebrates Mass once, the diocese will be that much better off."
So he was accepted, and came to St. Ambrose again. When I met him then, he was about 185 pounds.
He went through the seminary, was ordained, and then on to his various assignments.
BUT HE lived the cross physically as well as spiritually. He knew that doing the very things that seemingly make us unhappy, living the Beatitudes, will make us happy.
After he was in the hospital recently I visited and asked him, "Does it hurt?" He said, "Not any more than usual." He we was in daily pain most of his life. That's what I mean by living the cross.
But not many people knew that. They didn't know he was suffering because he didn't talk about it. He was happy. Gosh, was he happy.
Then I saw him Sunday and I said, "Gee, you seem to have a cold." His voice was real deep now, and he was tiring. I said "I'm going to leave now. I'm tiring you out."
And here we are a week later. And we now not only know that he lived the cross, but hope that he is living the triumph of the cross today.
So my prayer is eternal rest grant unto him, O Lord, and let perpetual light shine upon him. May his soul and the souls of all the faithful departed, through the mercy of God, rest in peace.”

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The best of the best'

Following are the introductory remarks of Bishop Daniel R. Jenky, CSC, at last Friday's funeral Mass for Msgr. Campbell. Bishop Jenky was principal celebrant of the Mass.

“OUR DIOCESE is so blessed to be served by holy and zealous priests. But today we come together to pray for the repose of the soul of the best of the best.
Monsignor Campbell was a gentleman and a scholar. He certainly was a man of great spiritual insight. He was filled with zeal for Christ and His Church.
On behalf of all my brother priests and all in this diocese, I want to extend to his family our most sincere late condolences and the promise of our prayers for Monsignor and for your own consolation.”

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John Bolds will be remembered for his quirky sense
of humor, ingenuity and friendliness.
--Photo Courtesy of Jesse Ferlianto;
Jennifer Sutcliffe, Editor, April 06, 2004

College sophomore John Bolds died of a self-inflicted gunshot wound early Friday morning at Woodruff Residential Center. Known by family and friends as a hard worker, independent thinker and genuine spirit, Bolds was found at 4 a.m. Friday in a car with a Tennessee license plate at the turnaround in front of Woodruff. Police said the student who found him contacted the Emory First Responders Unit and the police, and medical attendants pronounced Bolds dead of "self-inflicted wounds." Bolds was 20 years old.
"It was like someone stuck a burning poker in your stomach," Bolds' father, Michael, said of hearing of his son's suicide. College sophomore Jerry Abraham, who lived in Alabama Hall with Bolds their freshman year, said he was shocked to learn Bolds had taken his life.
"It's not just like he disappeared or transferred," Abraham said. "He's gone."
Bolds, a math and philosophy major, lived off campus and "made his own rules" in life, his parents said. He was an active member of the Emory Libertarians and Emory Swing Club, and a novice on the Emory Crew team. His friends said he was very active in Outdoor Emory rock climbing, worked at Famous Pub and Sports Palace and was interested in studying abroad in Egypt. A native of Nashville, Tenn., Bolds is survived by his father, a medical doctor; his mother, Liz Schneider, a homemaker; his brother, Tom, 17; and sister, Clare, 14.
According to police records, Bolds purchased the gun used in the suicide at a Wal-Mart at 5:20 p.m. Thursday, Schneider said. A wake will be held this Saturday in Nashville at Woodlong Funeral Home from 10 a.m. to noon, followed by a family memorial service at First Unitarian Universalist Church at 1 p.m. Emory plans to hold a memorial service at Cannon Chapel and has tentatively scheduled the event for April 16 at 4 p.m., said Susan Henry-Crowe, dean of the chapel and Religious Life.
In honor of Bolds, Abraham and other students placed flowers and signs in front of Woodruff. Abraham said he was upset to find that most students did not yet know about Bolds' death and that a memorial had not already been held.
"People find out about deaths in Iraq before they find out about deaths on campus," Abraham said. "I drove by Woodruff and everything was as if nothing had happened."
Bolds left an away message on his America Online Instant Messanger profile Thursday afternoon that read:
"'To be or not to be? That is the question.'/overregulated and underaccepted/I appear too green for my own good, but I feel so blue./To understand me: Libertarian philosophy applied to life; Linkin Park songs/April Fools Day!"
On Tuesday, an editorial appeared in the Wheel describing a "green" guy as the nice guy who finishes last in college romances and a "blue" one as the rebel who attracts the opposite sex. It could not be confirmed whether there was any connection.
Nima Farsinejad, a School of Medicine research specialist who knew Bolds through the Swing Club, said the message may have been a warning sign.
"It was clearly a cry for help and nobody even noticed," Farsinejad said. "This is a tragedy, and no one knows exactly why it happened."
Abraham asked students to listen to Bolds' "final statement" and face the reality of student suicides.
"He lived off campus and he drove [to Woodruff] to tell us something, and we need to listen," Abraham said. "He was somebody's child, somebody's brother, and we are really going to miss him."
Henry-Crowe said that in light of Bolds' death, the University should be made aware that "nobody should ever take their life." "It is a real tragic and sad loss for the community," Henry-Crowe said.
College sophomore Jolyn Taylor, to whom some students said Bolds was closest, said Bolds' death speaks to a larger issue of students who feel displaced from society.
"The part in [Bolds'] message where it says 'overregulated and underappreciated' says something about the way people treat each other," Taylor said. "Pay attention to people and listen when they ask you to. They might not be your closest friend, but everyone needs someone."
Taylor said Bolds often seemed lonely and excluded from social groups. She said she ate lunch with Bolds and her freshman roommate, College sophomore Lucila Crena, almost every day freshman year.
"He was always wanting to go out and to reach out to people, but they would rarely reach back," Taylor said. "He didn't fit in socially. People often slighted him, and he wasn't oblivious to it - he could feel it."
The day before the suicide, Taylor said, Bolds didn't seem to be upset about anything. Taylor, who said she talked to Bolds on the phone at least once a week, said when they last talked Thursday Bolds asked her where would be a good place to go on a first date. "It was just a random conversation and didn't have anything to do with a particular girl," Taylor said. "He wasn't connecting to girls he had met so far."
Taylor said Bolds was a generous and kind person who genuinely tried to connect with people.
"He always made sure to get good Christmas gifts for his family," Taylor said. "He spent extra time on that."
College freshman Xixi Cheng, who was in the Swing Club with Bolds, said he was very friendly and a good swing dancer. "He was a little reserved, but once you actually talked to him, he had a lot to say," Cheng said. "He was a very genuine person, which is why we got along so well."
Bolds' father said his son was a "very independent person" who had trouble connecting with others and making friends. He said Bolds didn't like taking advice from others and was very interested in Libertarianism, a political philosophy emphasizing independence and self-responsibility.
"He made all his own decisions, and he made this final decision on his own and carried it out," Michael Bolds said. "He would want to be remembered as someone who lived his life his own way."
Michael Bolds attributed his son's suicide to "intrinsic depression," and said he doubted it was caused by a specific event. He said his son was depressed by his inability to connect with people.
He said Bolds had suffered from depression since high school, but stopped visiting a psychiatrist and taking medication because he didn't want the help.
"He tried to fight his [lack of social skills] as best he could on his own, but it was just how God made him and there wasn't much he could do," Michael Bolds said. "He perceived people as slighting him or rejecting him, and it got to him. It might not have gotten to other people in the same way."
Michael Bolds said John was not very close to his family, but had some friends at school. "He had people he could talk to, but didn't at the most crucial time," Michael Bolds said. "I don't know why - maybe he was too proud, or maybe he felt so miserable so long that he felt like things couldn't change."
Schneider, Bolds' mother, said her son enjoyed reading books on Libertarianism and watching situation comedies on TV. "He had his own quirky sense of humor," Schneider said. "He really liked 'Seinfeld.' He would sit alone in the basement and you'd hear him laughing out loud. It was the only time we really heard him laugh."
Both his parents said people at the University had been "very supportive" in helping them cope with his suicide.
"We were always worried about him and prayed that nothing bad would happen to him," Michael Bolds said. "But there's no way you can ever prepare for something like this."

The Nashville 'Tennessean' Obituary for
John Alfred BOLDS, Age 20, Friday, April 2, 2004.

Born and raised in Nashville, John graduated from Martin Luther King Magnet High School in 2002. He was a Sophomore at Emory University, studying mathematics and philosophy. Survived by his mother, Elizabeth Schneider; father, Michael Bolds; brother, Thomas Bolds; sister, Clare Bolds; grandmothers, Christine Bolds and Jeanne Byorth; numerous uncles, aunts and cousins. Visitation with the family will be held at the funeral home from 10 a.m. until noon on Saturday with a 1 p.m. memorial service scheduled at First Unitarian-Universalist Church, 1808 Woodmont Blvd. In lieu of flowers, donations may be directed to the First Unitarian-Universalist Church. John lives on in our hearts and will be sadly missed. Arrangements by Woodlawn Funeral Home.

Posted 04/06/2004


Without personally knowing this young man, I believe I can tell exactly what he meant by 'over regulated and under-appreciated'. He was obviously politically savvy enough to realize the futility of individualism, in an era where one party runs on a platform of greed and intolerance, and the other wishes the assimilation of the individual, for the greater good of the collective society. Neither offered a home for one who merely wishes to be left alone.
Once he realized that his vision of a just and true libertarian future would not come to fruition without the basic destruction of the government, he chose the path less taken. I hope people remember this young man the next time they 'put down the geek'. This geeks blood is on someone's hands, and they are living with the consequences of their hatred, and will continue to do so.
There is a reason why so many young people are on antidepressants. They see what we, their parent's generation, are doing to destroy their future, and he so loved his freedom and country that he probably choose the ultimate liberty of suicide, rather than live a life of servitude to Uncle Sam, and those who now own him.
Rest well, young man. the fight carries on.
Rick Day, Interim Executive Director, LPGa, Atlanta

Posted 04/06/2004 (2)

Would it be possible to post an address or email account to send sympathies to his family? John was in my freshman seminar and I had seen him on campus occasionally afterwards. He was so genuinely nice I just want to make sure his family knows he will be missed at Emory.
Amy Nisman, anisman@learnlink.emory.edu, student

Posted 04/06/2004 (3)

everyone that knew Bolds should take a hard look at their interactions with him. This story resonates well with me; I too almost took the same path.
Now ten years out, with a much better understanding of myself can I see the situation for what it really was for me...
a true tragedy for him that he chose to leave early.
drD, 85@bowser.stanford.edu

Posted 04/06/2004 (4)

Perhaps he was autistic? I understand that an inability to connect with people is a sign of autism; there are many degrees of autism, most are not as extreme as "Rainman"...
Anonymus Alum, Teacher, Washington

Posted 04/07/2004 (5)

John and I had become good friends this semester. We hung out fairly frequently. I just wish I could figure out why he didn't talk to me about his suicidal thoughts. I understand that he might feel embarrassed at sharing such things, but I guess I just feel like we were close enough for him to talk to me about even that. He asked me for tips on how to approach women, how to identify signs that a female is interested in a guy, etc. He mentioned that he was depressed in high school and said that had contributed to his lack of experience with women. I just wish that I would have said something more to really get him to understand that this did not mean he was somehow undesirable or unworthy as an individual. I can't believe he's gone. I used to see him every day of the week, and now... We talked about everything together, why couldn't his current state of depression have been among those topics? I wish I could have identified it and talked to him about it. I just miss him so much. I keep expecting to see him walk through the door in the classes we had together, and I don't cease to feel disappointment when he does not come. I guess the full impact of his absence has still not sunk in yet. I can't even write a paper without thinking about him because we studied together for exams that covered so many areas that I have constant memories of things he said about particular topics we studied. He was a brilliant, brilliant man. I loved studying with such a great mind, and conversing with him about nothing and about everything was even more fun. He was a really nice guy that was very approachable and easy to talk to. I miss him so much.
Nermin Ghali, nghali@learnlink.emory.edu, Student, Emory University

Posted 04/07/2004 (6)

I went to John from elementary to high school. I never slighted or slandered him, but I was part of the bigger problem because I never reached out to him and neither did anyone else, and for this I am sincerely sorry. What I am taking from this a new outlook on how I choose to treat people and interact with them. I just regret that it was his death that made me really think about this. To the Bolds family, John's friends, and John; I speak for the MLK students that I've talked to and myself when I say I'm so sorry.
Brian, b-lee6@northwestern.edu, Student, Evanston, IL

Posted 04/07/2004 (7)

I think all of you people are really messed up. How the hell can you refer to suicide as "the ultimate liberty"?? That is just sick. You all need to stop speculating about this poor guy and respect him and his family. Instead of wasting your time wondering and gossiping about him (autism? are you frickin' kidding me?) go let some people know you love them. Mind your own business a little bit more and everyone else's a little bit less.
Tracey, onecor1213@yahoo.com, student, Atlanta

Posted 04/07/2004 (8)

As somebody who graduated from Emory last year, I have a mild understanding of the social system that exists at the school. This reminds me of Trey Parker's comments in Bowling For Columbine. He said that he wished he could just grab the kids who committed those horrible murder-suicides and explain to them that life is not stagnant, that the small things that bothered him (girls, social interaction, etc.) are not always going to exist the way they currently do, and that you need to create your own reasons to be happy. I am not, of course, comparing these very different events, but sometimes its easy to lose perspective, sometimes you think things will never get better. I think this mindset is common in suicide victims, and all people who resort to violent and self-destructive measures. I think something people need to take from this tragedy is that there is no glamour in suicide, that life is a gift, and also that we should always try to reach out to others and be more supportive and friendly in our daily lives.
Mike, Alum, NY, NY

Posted 04/07/2004 (9)

I meant absolutely no disrespect by suggesting that John may have been autistic. Autism is a condition that is suffered by millions in silence, and one of its main "symptoms" is an inability to connect with others. Recent studies actually suggest that it may be an extreme form of male intelligence. If recognized, autistic individuals can receive treatment that can help them learn how to interact in society and achieve the sense of belonging that many people desire.
For more information, check out the book entitled The Essential Difference by psychologist Simon Baron-Cohen or Newsweek's September 8th, 2003 edition.
My deepest sympathies to John's family and friends. Do not blame yourselves.
anonymous alum, teacher, Washington state

Posted 04/08/2004 (10)

I went to high school with John, but never really knew him. I am with Brian in that I wish I had just stopped to talk to him even once. Things like this make you realize that the little actions you may or may not take do in fact affect people. I knew his brother Tom, and he is a great guy, I have no idea the pain it must be to lose a sibling. And I am so sorry to his family. And I will continue to be praying for them. I cannot even imagine what they are going through.
Esther, ewise@northpark.edu, student, Chicago, IL

Posted 04/09/2004 (11)

I had known John in high school and known how funny and articulated he could be. But I also saw him struggling to connect with people. I wish I could have done better to make him connect with me. John will always be remembered by me and hopefully by the rest of his classmates.
Matt, mdo2c@mtsu.edu

Posted 04/09/2004 (12)

Emory counseling/suicide prevention services. How many other Emory students might be contemplating suicide right now, as they read this article? Suicide is such a tragedy for the victim and more so for the loved ones left behind. They have to live with it.
Yet suicide must be the single most preventable cause of death. So while the article is well written, informative, and touching, I'm disappointed that there is no mention of services that Emory provides for emotional support or emergencies. Where is the number for the suicide hot line? Or the contact info for counseling services at Emory?
How many young people are "feeling that they can relate to John" and don't know who to turn to?
I'd like to see the Emory Wheel - or anyone else who has the information - post PROMINENTLY any contact info for counseling and/or suicide prevention services. It might save a life and a family.
Can feel the pain,
xstarswinx@yahoo.com

Posted 04/09/2004 (13)

As John's father, please accept my thanks for the thoughts and feelings you have all shared about John. I'm still at a loss to really understand how this terrible event could have happened. It is comforting to know that so many people cared about John, even if he didn't realize it. We would welcome e-mail or letters from any of John's friends.
The Bolds Family, 4612 Mountainview Dr, Nashville, TN 37215, jmbolds@aol.com
Michael Bolds, M.D., jmbolds@aol.com, Nashville, TN

Posted 04/11/2004 (14)

I had lunch with John and some other people during a swing dance workshop last fall, over at GA Tech. He impressed me as someone who really thought things through and was very intelligent. I was saddened to hear this terrible news about him. We had talked about his interesting double major, and he had said that the line between philosophy and math was not really so defined as people might think. We had a lively political discussion on the way back to the workshop. I am so sorry that he is not with us anymore.
Sara, sara_bedrosian@yahoo.com, technical consultant, atlanta

Written during funeral by Emory Student Jonathan Brown

“No hope to give, Now words to say, No smiles to share, this tragic day, there is only sorrow, there is only pain.
My falling tears, Pour lie the rain, In one sad day, On one cold night, This broken world, Lost all its light.
Now we are left, To mourn your loss, To struggle with, Your self made cross.
Now we are left...To sit and cry...Goodbye, dear friend...Dear friend, Goodbye.”

Handed to John's Dad after the funeral.

---

Lift Every Voice: Ending the blame game at Emory;
recent suicides call for reform
By Bharath Parthasarathy, April 13, 2004

Emory was rocked hard last week by the unfortunate losses of John Bolds and Janet Cooke, two independent souls who felt isolated from our Druid Hills community.
As the initial shock wears away and our community begins to consider the valuable contributions of these individuals to our lives and to this institution, our community is also becoming cognizant of our own actions toward one another. As a result, though, a plethora of questions, doubts and second guesses arise amid our grief.
Unfortunately, John Bolds and Janet Cooke are not alone in their actions. Suicide currently ranks as the third-leading cause of death amongst 15 to 24 year olds, and it is estimated that college and university students are 50 percent more likely to commit suicide than those in the general population.
Moreover, suicide is beginning to hit all populations equally. Although white males represent about 70 percent of all cases of suicide, in recent years there has been a rise in the number of suicides among white women and black males. Additionally, Emory is not alone as an institution that must grapple with community members who do not feel welcome within its borders.
A growing number of colleges and universities must continually deal with the losses of valuable community members. New York University, for example, has had four student suicides in the past two semesters alone.
Colleges and universities can be great places of learning, but they can also be filled with stress and frustration. Therefore, every community must begin to address growing concerns over depression, stress and social isolation.
Within our campus community, however, there are those who have chosen to focus on the negative, rather than to celebrate these individuals' accomplishments.
First, several individuals have harshly criticized the University for not publicly sharing the news of the passing of John Bolds and Janet Cooke. These criticisms are unfounded.
The University properly informed those individuals who had a right to such knowledge - families, friends, co-workers, hallmates, etc.
Additionally, the community's desire to gain information does not trump those of the families involved, especially when families may not want the news to be shared.
Campus-wide e-mails are appropriate for public-safety announcements and invitations to inaugurations, but they are highly improper venues for dispersing personal, sensitive information like the suicide deaths of Emory community members.
Second, some misguided individuals have unfairly targeted Lauren Klein's "Green for the Blue Guy" (March 30) column as the source of John Bolds' actions. Such absurd rhetoric is absolutely shameful.
A single column - one that in any other week would be read and enjoyed by many of its critics - is not the source for depression, nor a stimulus for suicide.
While John Bolds' Instant Messenger away message referenced "green" and "blue," mere correlation does not equal causation. The attack letters against Klein and her writings should cease immediately and the Wheel should refrain from printing any further personal attacks against her.
Instead of dwelling on administrative failures, Emory needs to honor the legacies of John Bolds and Janet Cooke by learning from the past week and aiming to help others by creating new systems for preventing suicide and for diagnosing and treating depression. Emory should focus on three key priorities:
First, the University should better publicize its existing resources for faculty, staff and students. These resources include the Emory University Counseling Center (217 Cox Hall or 404-727-7450); the Residence Life, Campus Life and Religious Life staffs; and the Emory HELPLINE (404-727-HELP).
Second, Emory should consolidate all these fragmented resources under one central location, a Suicide Prevention Center. Counselors, psychologists and peer mentors could all be located in one easily accessible spot to provide free, confidential assistance to those community members in need.
This Center could also provide specialized programs and counseling services during high-stress periods, such as final exams and career-recruitment weeks.
Finally, Emory should move quicker in requiring that all first- and second-year students live in residence halls. Studies show that students who are engaged in campus activities and live on campus are less likely to attempt suicide.
These students become invested in their education and meet others like them. Additionally, they have resident advisors and other trained staff whom they can turn to if issues arise.
By requiring the first-year and sophomore experience to be in a dorm, students considering suicide can be reached out to by the University before tragedy is borne out. An unfortunate by-product of the heightened campus dialogue regarding the recent suicides is the tendency to forever characterize John Bolds, Janet Cooke and others before them as "victims of suicide." However, these individuals deserve more than just this label.
A better tribute to them is to forever remember them as dreamers, co-workers, advocates and, above all else, members of the Emory family. May they rest in peace.
Bharath Parthasarathy is a second-year law student from Atlanta

Libertarianism leads to a dead end,
by Meyer London Tuesday April 06, 2004
I can't help but think that the libertarian nonsense this fellow imbibed may have contributed to his tragic suicide. It is a blame the victim philosophy that has more than a hint of 16th century Calvinism about it - dreary, glorying in the accumulation of material possessions, dividing the world into "winners" and "losers," with the latter invited to blame themselves for their problems and not expect any help from anyone. And, needless to say, the libertarian insistence upon the easy availability of guns should be considered in the light of how this young man, in the midst of a deep but what probably would have been a temporary depression, was able to quickly and easily obtain the weapon that killed him. If you like the 19th century London depicted in Dickens' novels you will love libertarianism.

In memory of John Bolds
Three letters in response to the tragedy
April 09, 2004


To the Editor:

In response to the student suicide last Friday, the overall University's response to this incident was horrible. There was no statement or announcement publicly made that I am aware of as a graduate student, until the Wheel article ("Friends, family shocked by College student's suicide," April 6). This seems an inappropriate manner in which a school should be informed of such a tragic event. This complaint deals with the school's student services and management - not with the Wheel.
However, in reading your article, I was upset and concerned that nowhere was there reference made to where students could receive any sort of counseling, or where to seek support.
Plus, there was no follow-up information on whom to contact in regards to a local student memorial service or what organizations will do in response, since it seems some students would take such messages seriously.
Lara Hendy, MPH candidate, International Health,
President, Student Government Association, Rollins School of Public Health

To the Editor:

My heart goes out to the family and friends of College sophomore John Bolds who died last week. If any possible good can come of such a tragedy, let it be this: that others will learn something from his death, and that future tragedies can be avoided. What can we learn? That John died of a disease: depression. Much progress has been made in recent years to begin to educate the public about this dangerous disease, but unfortunately many more lives will be lost before it is fully understood and accepted. Think about four of your friends. One of you will get depression at some point in your life. And of those that get it, 15 percent will die by suicide.
Depression is not simply a bad mood - it is an incredibly common disease of the brain. Certain chemicals in the brain get out of whack, from any number of possible causes. The brain might be the most complicated organ in our bodies, so it is not surprising that in one out of five of us, something goes wrong at some point.
Depression is sometimes compared to the better-understood disease of diabetes. In both cases, the production and use of chemicals in an important organ in our bodies can threaten our very lives. And in both cases, successful treatment is available. John had been treated for depression - but he stopped taking his medication and other treatments.
This is also quite common. During treatment, the illness lifts and one thinks he is "cured", and stops treatment. Unfortunately, for most people who get depression, it will return. Like diabetes, lifetime treatment is often necessary. And perhaps the most insidious thing about depression is that those who suffer from it often learn how to hide it, and it can be almost impossible for others, no matter how close they are, to help.
I know all this because I have depression. I've been very open about it, and because of that I have learned how many others around me also live with it. If you suspect that yourself or anyone around you may be suffering from depression, don't be shy about acting. Better safe than sorry. We owe that to John Bolds, his family and friends.
William Ransom, Emerson Professor of Music

To the Editor:

I have not held my pen in so long that it now feels alien and strange, but I feel that if one is to be great with pen and paper, one needs to take a long step back to relearn, rethink and reflect.
It is today, on a not-so-ordinary day, following too many hours after the death of a member of our community, that I have decided to put ink to paper once more. What drives me to this is tragedy and sadness - but not directly for me, for I did not know him. But I do know some who did, and their distress grieves me. He was an ordinary young man in an ordinary town, not kept alive by anything special - because that, we failed to give him. I do not want to place blame on anyone and it's easily escapable to blame society at large. So how then can we reflect on ourselves through events such as this to learn and grow to be better for each other? How do we learn to look past difference into another's eye and see what is out of place in our own world?
We tend to have a sense of protection, a little bubble constructed by culture and reinforced though everyday actions and beliefs, but we suddenly lose that sense of protection when our view of reality is flipped upside down.
When two jets are deliberately flown into the very symbols of our consumer culture or when a young man deliberately takes his life on a college campus, there are reasons, and we rarely stop to think long enough about what those reasons are.
Instead of placing blame on the "other" or blaming the victim, as we often tend to do, perhaps we should see the problems in ourselves and recognize that we can make a difference in the world. As cultural beings, we are products of our cultural environments and we fail to look past the curtain of ethnocentrism to understand people and difference with respect. Instead, we judge with overreaching authority and superiority.
To combat this peacefully, we must learn from tragedy so that it can be prevented. We must lead by quiet example but not belittle those whose view of the world may be different from ours.
Reach out and help by understanding and listening to those marginalized in the community, because then we might give life where people see no hope.
In honor of those that teach us to see the world in a different light.
Jessica Burley, College Senior, In memory of John Bolds

Posted 04/10/2004

Today (April 10, 2004) I went to a Memorial Service for John Bolds in Nashville. John's brother Tom and my son Bobby were in Scouts together, and John's sister Clare and my daughter Grace are friends. The Service was very moving. John had family and friends who loved him. It's been a long time since I was in college (UVa, class of 78), but in addition to the parties and studying, I remember the struggles for identity and the concern about making it in the world. Depression and other illnesses often make their first appearance in one's twenties. If you are struggling, or if you know someone who is, accept help extended to you, and extend help to others. Don't become isolated, and try to help others whom you see becoming isolated. Those who suffer from depression will face a constant struggle, and they need support. You can make a difference simply by paying attention and reaching out to someone who appears to need it.
Robert Goodrich, lawyer, Nashville, Tennessee

Editorials

Our Opinion: The little things
In the wake of tragedy, look around you

Wheel Staff Editorial, April 09, 2004

John Bolds surrendered his life last Friday morning. By Sunday, multiple letters and articles had been sent to the Wheel in response to the tragedy. By Tuesday night, another string of written replies had been directed our way. On the Wheel's Web site, John's obituary has prompted immense feedback. Some of the authors know John personally - most do not.
The self-imposed exit of a college student makes for sad commentary. The fact that it has taken such misfortune to awaken the profound in us is equally depressing. The opposite page features select reflections from among the Emory community. The general themes are recurring: love thy neighbor, engage in random acts of kindness and care for the community.
These may be clichés, but clichés are popular for a reason - they're right. And only at the darkest of occasions is their inherent value revealed.
Let us be clear: We do not exist alone, and as a result, we do not exist immune to the pain and joy of others. If we are to sustain any faith in human relationships, we must accept these truths.
Each one of us can make an impact on others. We may not have the power to save a life, but we do have the power to change one. This is the essence of community.
In recent months, much has been said about "community." Opponents of David Horowitz invoked it in February, and those concerned with Mary Robinson have used the word in the preceding weeks. But after the suicide of a peer, these former appeals smack of cynicism - as they should.
Community is not a ready-made tool to be pulled from the proverbial toolbox at one's convenience; it is a human reality. If there is one emotion that defined us all when learning of Bolds' death, it was one of sympathy, of human connectedness. Our point is a simple one: The Emory community needn't experience a tragedy of this magnitude to bring us together (in the sincerest sense of the term). Being sensitive to one another should not be our mantra only in the wake of suicide or death. And treating those around us as subjects of a unique soul, not objects of our perception, needn't signify an exception, but rather the rule.
In the weeks ahead, a sense of normalcy will most likely return. Many will gradually forget what has happened, as final exams and papers near their deadlines. On Thursday nights, as well as on the weekends, Emory students will congregate in droves to celebrate the drunken whims of the moment. There will be a memorial service for our lost neighbor, and there will be a good showing, but for a lot of us, it will probably serve as a delay to an inevitable loss of urgency. Regrettably, on the heels of tragedy, our eventual forgetfulness tends to be as intrinsic to human nature as our immediate woe.
But it doesn't have to be this way for all of us. We needn't surrender. We must stubbornly remember how we feel now. Sometimes it takes a big symbol (like a candle-light vigil on the Quadrangle) - other times, we only need that small, sincere moment. Sit with the person eating alone at the DUC. Ask how the person next to you on the shuttle is doing. Be honest with your friends, and with yourself. In doing so, we must begin to live the clichés we speak - not just speak them.
Maybe then, and only then, another saddened 20-year-old will be inspired to live them with us.
The above staff editorial represents the majority opinion of the Wheel editorial board
Our Opinion: The little things
Post your feedback on this topic here

On the Record: Suicide prevention is key
By Paige Rohe, April 09, 2004

Life isn't easy. We've all had moments when the idea of dying seems more attractive than continuing to battle the sadness or hopelessness overwhelming us. For some, depression is a constant battle. Although there is successful treatment available, resistance to seeking help for this disease can be fatal.
According to the National Center for Injury Prevention, suicide takes more lives every year than homicide. It is the third-leading cause of death for young people aged 15 to 24.
The National Alliance for the Mentally Ill estimates that approximately 10 million adults suffer from a major depressive disorder each year.
Unfortunately, the only discussion we have on this campus about mental health is how to deal with college stress. While stress is one of the leading causes of depression, it is certainly not the only one. There is, in fact, no single cause of depression, and one's risk for the illness increases if you have a family history of depression, have experienced a traumatic event in your life (such as the loss of a loved one) or if you use drugs.
Depression is treatable and suicide is preventable. Yet many people refrain from acknowledging their problem because of the stigma attached to mental illness.
Others may not be able to help themselves and their friends may not know what to do either.
Emory, as a university, needs to make a stronger committment to promoting mental well-being among its students, faculty and staff. John Bolds' death is a tragedy for his friends, his family and his community.
But he is not the first, and he will not be the last.v Last year, a professor committed suicide and the year before, a freshman hanged herself in her dorm's bathroom. This past weekend, Janet Cooke, a staff worker in the Woodruff Library, took her own life on Tybee Island.
We have lost so much, much more than most of us can even comprehend.v While we are so concerned with what place Emory, as a university, should have in this world, what happens to those who need a sense of belonging within our community like John Bolds, Selene Rodriguez, professor Alec Hodel and library staffer Janet Cooke? We need to talk openly and frankly about suicide on campus and about how to prevent it.
We must teach our community to recognize the symptoms of depression in ourselves and among our peers: persistently sad or irritable mood; pronounced changes in sleep; difficulty thinking or concentrating; lack of interest in or pleasure from activities that were once enjoyed; feelings of guilt, worthlessness, hopelessness and emptiness; recurrent thoughts of death and suicide; and persistent physical symptoms, such as headaches or chronic pain, that do not respond to treatment (from www.nami.org). We must remind ourselves and our friends that there is nothing shameful about having a mental illness and that there is hope. We cannot bring those members of our community lost to us back again, but we can honor their memory by preventing the same fate for others.
Paige Rohe is a College senior from Atlanta

A Eulogy to a friend
By Jeff Jackson, April 06, 2004

Without a shred of exaggeration, I can say that John Bolds was the warmest, kindest and most sincere Emory student I ever met. In every conversation I ever had with him, he would look me right in the eyes, smile and just be pleasant. He was truly a benevolent soul - one of Emory's wonderful people.
John never had a hidden agenda. He wore his emotions right on his sleeve, had no concern to mock or be sarcastic and always had the time to stop and chat with friends. He always put himself out there, looking for new ways to meet people. He told me he joined Crew just to make friends. He was like that.v John's interest in politics and political philosophy motivated him to join the Emory Libertarians, which is where I first met him. Once or twice a month for the last two years, John and I would meet with a small group of close-knit friends to eat pizza and talk about the travesties of big government.
In a group largely characterized by (what most would consider) abrasive debate tactics, John consistently rose above the fray, always making his points with poise - never with derision. I am absolutely certain I never heard him raise his voice. If he had, it would have shocked us all into silence. That just wasn't John.v Now John is gone. I will never get the chance to tell him these things. I missed it. I knew he was sinking, but I just didn't know how to help.
John had a hard time relating to people. Emory was not the right school for him. He needed a smaller community, somewhere he could really fit in. He was a pure, kind person, but he wasn't a master of social skills - and he knew it.
He tried to talk to some of his friends about it, but we didn't know how to handle the situation - we didn't know how we could help. So we kept seeing him and talking to him and being quietly concerned about him. And now he's gone. The worst-case scenario actually happened.
I feel like if I could have talked to John for just half an hour, this never would have happened. He needed someone to tell him that he was wanted, that he belonged, that we liked having him around. All of these things were true, but we just never openly talked about them. It's a stupid guy thing; it just would have been awkward.
We never sat down with John and made sure that he knew that he mattered to us, despite his obvious longing for recognition. We could have stopped this. I'll probably feel like that for the rest of my life.
John, I'm sorry. You were our friend, and we let you down.v I want you to know that you are not forgotten, that you will always be with us and that we wish to God that we had just had 30 minutes to spare last Thursday night.
Because this didn't need to happen. It was completely preventable.
I'm so sorry, John. I am so damn sorry.
We miss you.
Former Editorials Editor Jeff Jackson is a College senior from Chapel Hill, N.C.
04/06/2004 Jeff- You have written a beautifully...
Susan Gregory, EC'79

04/07/2004 Thanks for the eulogy
Grace Schneider (John's aunt)

Posted 04/06/2004

Jeff,
You have written a beautifully sensitive and poignant eulogy to John.
I am an Emory graduate, Oncology Social Worker, and a Nashville resident who is a friend of John's family.
I want you to know that, despite your feelings of regret and guilt, there is probably nothing you could have done to prevent this tragedy. John struggled with these issues all his life and his pain continued on at Emory. This was an impulsive act in the making that was missed by many and, again, probably was unstoppable.
It sounds as if you were kind to John and that John was fortunate to have had a thoughtful friend in his life such as yourself. We all evaluate our actions and our non-actions in situations like this, but do know that, in the end, John made this ultimate decision and took the ultimate responsibility for his final act. You are not responsible for John's decision, although grieving him and missing him is appropriate, expected, painful, and normal.
I will think of you and the others who recognized the unique qualities that made John who he was, acted kindly to John while he was with us, and are now left to mourn his decision and life.v Take good care of yourself during this time.
Susan Gregory, EC'79, Oncology Social Worker, Nashville, TN

Sending the wrong message: Nice guys can finish first
By Alexis Hauk, April 09, 2004

I've felt extremely cold since hearing of the death of someone I never even knew on Friday. I can't say exactly what disturbs me the most about it, besides the obvious.
John Bolds' suicide resonates so harshly because everyone has felt that kind of isolation at one point or another. That kind of desperation, which we all identify with, just enough to push you over the edge, is scary.
Suicide is the greatest wound that someone can inflict on those whom they love. Death is already hard enough without knowing that the person who died wanted it, chose it over living longer with us in this world.
Perhaps I feel sick after this tragedy-at-a-distance because of the eerily related article "Green for the blue guy" (March 30) by Lauren Klein. Wow, what a novel point: So girls really aren't attracted to nice guys? Thank God she was the first to say it, 'cause I never would have stumbled upon this premise first.
I mean, nice guys? Phew, they don't already feel horrible enough about themselves because girls would rather date a--holes, as every movie, book, magazine and television show suggests. Jeez. How enlightening and necessary. Bravo.
Klein's article was pure drivel with no productive point. Obviously, the author is just not very mature yet, or she'd realize that, yes, some guys are defined as a--holes and some guys are "nice'" - in their limited communities.
But both sides have different degrees, and no one person is defined all the time by how they might act at a bar or at a party with a silly girl. (Well, maybe she did try and mention that people are in fact complicated, but I got a little confused with all the color metaphors "mixing around," if you will).
In my opinion, only a crayola crayon itself could have written an article that shallow.
Do I believe that Ms. Klein actually has gotten to know "green" guys and found them uninteresting still? No
. The world is much more complex and intricate than Frat Row.
John Bolds had a "sexy bad-ass" core, too - if you follow the Klein article's wisdom. This "blue" anger was directed at himself, of course.
And I don't blame him. He wasn't autistic, as one person on the Wheel Web site suggested. He was very grounded in reality. What really gets to me is that I wish someone had, oh I don't know, taken away his depression magically, or told him that school doesn't mean all that much in the grand scheme of things, like I wish someone had told the kids at Columbine, and like I wish someone had told countless others who I've known and who my friends have known, before they pulled the Wal-Mart-bought trigger and released themselves from their personal hells.
I love nice guys, and it hurts that there's one less at Emory.
Alexis Hauk is a College sophomore from Decatur, Ga.

Dear Family and Friends,

We want to thank you all for the love and support you have given us since John's death. This tragedy reminds us of the unfathomable depths of the human spirit. John's life was a journey filled with moments of happiness and longer stretches of sadness. Like all of us he was trying to find his way through the wilderness as best he could. He tended to be solitary and independent by nature, which made for a lonely journey. The outpouring of love we have seen since his death would have surprised him - he simply didn 't realize how many lives he touched and the love that was his for the taking.
This love is what gives us the strength to carry on after this loss. We aren 't alone as poor John must have felt at the end. The Emory community has also held us up. There are articles and responses about John's death at www.emorywheel.com.

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In Memory of John Alfred Bolds, Part 2

EMORY UNIVERSITY
Department of Sociology
Atlanta, Georga
April 8, 2004

Dear Dr. Bolds and Mrs. Schneider,

As one of your son's teachers at Emory, I write to express my sympathy with your loss. Though my words can do little to soften your pain, I thought you might like to hear how I came to know John. Last semester, John took my course on the Development of Sociological Theory. He had come to see me earlier in the year to ask whether, as a philosophy major, he would be able to manage the course, which is required for sociology majors. I explained to him that it was a demanding course that covered difficult texts and ideas, but I also assured him that with his background he would probably do well. Our first conversation left me impressed with his desire to take an intellectual risk. I was very pleased that John decided to enroll because I sensed that he would contribute a different perspective to our class discussions. Indeed he did. m his quiet but articulate way, he responded to my questions and raised some of his own. After class he frequently came up to the front to pursue an issue he was still thinking about. He also visited me several times at my office, not simply to clarify particular readings but also to discuss other topics that interested him. On those occasions, in that setting, he seemed to feel at home in the flow of intellectual conversation. John kept in touch. For example, he recently asked me for a recommendation to support his application to a study abroad program. When I ran into him on campus not long ago, he told me how in one of his current courses he was continuing to study figures and ideas he encountered in my course. He also mentioned that he had read part of a classic work I had recommended to him as a way to explore the ideas of smart critics of his nascent libertarian philosophy. The fact that he took such recommendations seriously attests to his active, probing intellect. I fondly remember my conversations with John. He challenged me as he challenged himself. As you know better than I, he was also searching for a direction in life. I only wish he had kept arguing with me instead of deciding that the search would be fruitless. Because we came to know him as the gentle person and talented student he was, many of us at Emory mourn John's death along with you. I wish you much strength in the coming months. Sincerely,
(Signed)
Frank Lechner
Emory University
Tarbutton Hall
Atlanta, Georgia 30322
Tel404.727.7510
Fax404.7Z7.7532
An equal opportunity, affirmative action university

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EMORY UNIVERSITY
Department of Mathematics and Computer Science
April 12, 2004

Dear Bolds family,
I am writing to express my condolences for John's untimely death. I am very sorry for your loss. I was John's teacher in three of the four math classes he took while at Emory, and he signed up for my class for next year. I liked him, and I think he liked me. He was the most promising math major of the class of 2006, and I would like to describe some of my impressions of him.
John was by far the best student in my Fall 2002 advanced calculus class, which he took as a freshman. I told our director of undergraduate studies about him, and at the end of the class I encouraged John to take try the BS degree with honors. Though I was greatly impressed by the sharpness of his intellect, what I remembered most about him from that class was how every week he would make sure I had graded the homework sets, and if I was late, he'd make me pay for it, in a good natured way, of course. I've never had a student do that before. I learned later that this was part of his general proclivity for discovering uncomfortable truths and finding flaws in the establishment.
The next time I saw him was Fall 2003, shortly before classes started. I convinced him to enroll in my algebra course by appealing to his sense of challenge. To obtain a BA in math and a degree in philosophy, he did not need to take much more math. I suggested that for a real math degree he would need to take some higher level courses. His ears perked up at this notion, and on the first day of class I was surprised to see him sitting in the back row. The notion that the class would challenge him had changed his mind. For many students, the effect would have been opposite.
Algebra is a course based on proofs, and only appeals to those with a talent and appreciation for pure abstract thought. John's distinctive style was work intensely and single mindedly on a proof, determined to find his own way, mostly indifferent to the approaches of other students. He often resisted my suggestions and hints. He'd say "yeah, yeah, ok.." and then go back to his own way. He wanted to come up with his own solution. He didn't always end up with the best solution, or the shortest or most elegant solution, but he almost always found a solution, and this set him apart from everyone else in the class. He once turned what should have been a one paragraph proof into a two page proof. But it was his own proof! I strongly support this type of stubbornness, because I think the intellectual ownership that results is part of the foundation for a true intellectual life. I think he was going to be a person who had such a life. He seemed to have already discovered its value, and the value of owning his own truths. These things can't be taught, and most students won't discover them.
The class of about 14 for abstract algebra in Fall 2003 was the best I've ever had. All of the BS majors, some chemistry majors, and some premed students. John was one of the students who inadvertently made some of the others worry about their grades. He often spoke up in class, speaking clearly in his slightly dark, thoughtful way. He chose words carefully, and you could tell his goal was to understand, not impress. He had a great moment in the middle of the semester, when he was the only one in the class to solve the most difficult problem on an unusually difficult problem set. The class was awed by this solution, which was completely out of reach for most of them. Here is the problem. We consider the set of all possible permutations of some collection of objects. We say a permutation has "order 2" if when you perform it twice, you end up back where you started from. For example, switching exactly two of the objects with each other has order 2. The problem is to show that any permutation can be broken up into a succession of two permutations, each having order 2. No matter how big the set. John's solution to this problem was the best I've ever seen. He had a beautiful way of looking at it, and he drew a picture to show the rest of us how he'd done it, during an after-hours study session. When the rest of the class saw the solution the next day, some of the students were visibly astonished. I think he was very proud of this moment. I could tell he was pleased at their reaction, and I was happy for him. He reminded me of it later, as I was about to write a letter of recommendation for him for Study Abroad.
John liked our algebra class. Only four students continued into the spring semester (too much time, many said), and the ones who did got along well with each other. I invite active student participation in class, and John's not being afraid to rib me and question my authority played well with the rest of the students. We had some good laughs, usually with John and I going back and forth. On several occasions he'd laugh to the point of tears, and in retrospect, those were precious moments, when whatever might have been troubling him outside of class was gone, and he just felt the joy of laughing.
I never had a clue about his outside troubles. I know something about depression from experience, and I had some very dark years in college. I think there are many people who believe they could have helped John, if only they had known, and they regret missing the chance. But as you know, it was unlike John to ask for help. He wanted to solve it his own way, on his own terms. I know what that's like. He needed to find a truth that was worth living for, on his own. It's too bad that we couldn't show him that there is one. Those of us who made it across that thin bridge over the abyss to the other side mourn the loss of a fellow traveler, who looked down, and fell.
There are things that we in Emory's 2004 abstract algebra class don't want to forget now that he's gone, like the sound of his voice, or his attitude in class. He was a bright, curious, and gentle human being. We have all been profoundly shaken by his sudden, radical, irreversible decision, and wish to express our greatest sympathy to you, his family.

Sincerely,

(Signed)

Eric Brussel
Associate Professor

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P.S.

Following are two notes from John's fellow spring 2004 algebra students, Jesse Herman and Yitin Chen. Coincidentally, Jesse recalls the same event I described above. Melissa Crow, who was John's only real peer in the class, was hit hardest by John's suicide, and she was unable to put her thoughts into words at this time.

The first time I remember meeting John was watching him solve probably the hardest math problem I had ever seen. I won't try to explain his answer, but I will say that it involved an amazing permutation spiral that seemed to come straight out of a Hollywood movie. When I walked into our Algebra class this semester and saw that there were only four other people enrolled, I was definitely glad that John was among the four. His constant inquisitiveness, sense of humor and willingness to prove the teacher wrong (in a funny way of course) always injected life into our class sessions. I will always remember John as a vivacious, intelligent and thoughtful person who's passion and spirit inspired everyone around him.
My deepest sympathies,
Jesse Berman

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I don't know if this is appropriate, but its my feeling toward the whole incident..

Dear John,

I think it a shame that I can only get to know more about you reading EmoryWheels when you are no longer here... From the time of multi variable class, you have stuck me as a brilliant freshmen mathematician and a deep thinker. The excruciating pain of rejection and loneliness is also a never changing fact for me, especially as a minority. Hanging-out is also a violation of my constant-pursuing nature. Loneliness is determined fate for a mathematician. But thanks to you.. Your suicide, awaked me from the worse nightmare.

Sincerely,

Yitin Chen

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To: John

From: Nermin

You always had something interesting to say. Never harmed a soul or got in anyone's way. You just wanted a friend who would listen and care I just wish that on the morning of the 2nd, I'd been there. I'll never forget the conversations we had, the times that we'd share... Why couldn't you have told me about your pain, your despair? I would've lifted some off of your shoulders and placed it on mine. But, you didn't tell me how bad things were. Acted like everything was fine.
I admired your sense of humor, kindness, and smarts (shown in the grades you got). And the way you'd replace the flap of a coffee top 'cause you said it kept it hot'. You made me laugh when you described funny scenes from the Chapel Show. You knew that no matter what I had to do, once you began, I could not go. I was captivated by your mind and the way you expressed your thoughts. For just another minute to talk, I'd give up everything I've got. You were my comrade, and I loved spending time with you. Together, we studied, ate, drank, walked and talked - did everything friends would do.
I remember the Smirnoff Ice you drank in my apartment sitting at the table. While you, Erin, and I discussed Cassirer's notion of the myth and the fable. I see your face every time I walk into my living room. And I experience the terrifying feeling of impending doom. The sign that I should prepare for a waterfall of tears. That I feel I've been holding back for years. Even though it has been some time since you passed away. I feel like I was sitting in the debate office with you just yesterday.
There are details about you that I shall never forget. Like the idea of touring Egypt on which you were set. At Willie's you preferred nachos to a burrito. And to government regulation you said, "no!" You liked the outdoors Thought conservatives were bores. You tutored students in math. Liked to walk the independent path. You were a libertarian to the core. And, when it came to socializing, you always wanted more.
You shocked me with your death, and I was in denial for a day. Thinking that if I tried hard enough, I could wish its reality away. And live in a fantasy land where you could see me and I could see you. And we could hang out again like we used to do. I am reminded of your absence with each passing day. Even by my class readings of which you had lots to say.
My professors speak of Descartes, Dewey, Brandom, and Ginet. And each time their names are mentioned, I think of you. And recall whether you were accepting or critical of their views.
Sometimes I stare at your empty chair looking lonely without you in it. And wish I could've found a way to pull you of that deep, dark pit. Of your profound thoughts that revealed the absurdity of life. Its crazy, inexplicable features of struggle and strife. What you did seems irrational, though I know You reasoned it would end your suffering and woe. But that your time was so brief Leaves me aching with grief. Along with everyone whose lives you touched. And for that I am broken because it hurts to miss you so much.
I guess they say that the heart heals with time. Somehow I feel that doesn't apply to mine. I will never forget you, and for as long as I live I will stay true to my desire to give. And I will overcome my insecurity that I failed you because I did not do more. And continue to greet with kindness those that walk through my door.

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EMORY UNIVERSITY
Department of Philosophy
Atlanta, Georgia 30322
404.727.6577
Donald Phillip Verene
Charles Howard Candler Professor
of Metaphysics and Moral Philosophy
April 13, 2004

Dear Dr. and Mrs. Bolds:

I will be unable to attend the Memorial Service this Friday as I have a commitment to give and invited lecture at Baylor University.
I regret not being able to attend and to meet you. John was a student in my Philosophy 365, the philosophy of in/tuc (?) course this semester. He was one of the students who stood out in the course because he always asked good questions and often talked a while after class with more ideas. He was doing A work in the course. It was the first time he had taken a course from me and I liked him very much.

Sincerely yours,

(Signed) D. P. Verene

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Prior to her death she sang with the Resurrection Choir of St. Peter Parish. The celebration of her Life, Death and Resurrection was celebrated by Fr. John Brennell, Pastor, sixteen members of the Choir, members of her family and friends. Fr. John noted that she lived a strong faith and read a reading he received from her, which also appears on her memorial card.

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Entrance Song, "Sing a New Song"
First Scripture,
Revelation 21...There shall be no more death...
Responsorial Psalm, "Be Not Afraid"
Second Scripture,
Paul to the Romans...We too, live in newness of life...
Gospel Scripture, Homily and Intercession Petitions by Msgr. Shamleffer
Presentation of Gifts Song, "Only In God"
Communion Songs, "One Bread, One Body" and "You Are Near"
Tribute to John by Mary Lee
Recessional, "On Eagle's Wings"
Burial in Sacred Heart Cemetery
Sharing in St. Joseph Hall

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Frank T. Weidinger died Feb. 16, 2004, at home in Camas. He was 86. Weidinger was bom March 26, 1917, in Ballantine, Mont. He grew up on the family farm and later went to Marquette University where he received a bachelor's degree. He then went to St. Thomas Seminary in Kenmore, Wash., and was ordained a priest in June 1944. He ministered to parishes in the Great Falls and Billings, Mont., dioceses for 30 years. In 1975 he married Patricia Halla and they moved to Camas in 1976 with their 6-month-old daughter, Mary Pat. Frank worked at Highland Terrace Nursing Home as an activity director from 1976 to 1977. In 1977 he began to work as a custodian in the Camas School District, until retiring in 1994. He was an active member of St. Thomas Catholic Church. He served as Eucharist minister, worked in nursing home ministry a nd participated in the men's prayer group.
Weidinger is survived by his wife, Pat, at home; one daughter, Mary Pat and her husband, Chet, of Camas; one sister, Helen Dietzman of Camas; two brothers, Charles of Clovis, Calif., and Gregory of Billings; and two grandchildren.
An evening vigil service was held Thursday, at St. Thomas Catholic Church. A funeral mass was held Friday, at the church, followed by a burial at the Camas Cemetery. Straub's Funeral Home in Camas was in charge of arrangements.
Memorial donations can be made to "People to People For Haiti," c/o Straub's Funeral Home, 325 N.E. Third Ave., Camas, WA 98607.

“TO THOSE I LOVE”
If I should ever leave you, whom I love
To go along the silent way.Grieve not,
nor speak of me with tears, but laugh and talk
of me as if I were beside you there.
I'd come - I'd come, could I but find a way!
But would not tears and grief be barriers?
And when you hear a song or see a bird
I loved, please do not let the thought of me be sad...
For I am loving you just as I always have...
You were so good to me! There are so many things.
I wanted still to do - so many things to say to you...
Remember that I did not fear... it was just leaving you
That was so hard to face...we cannot see beyond...
But this I know: I loved you so - 'twas heaven here with you!
—Isia Paschal Richardson—

IN LOVING MEMORY OF Frank T. Weidinger
BORN March 26, 1917, Ballantine, Montana
ENTERED INTO REST February 16,2004, Camas, Washington

EVENING VIGIL SERVICE
Thursday, February 19, 2004 at 7:00 PM
St. Thomas Catholic Church, Camas, Washington
FUNERAL MASS Friday, February 20, 2004 at 10:00 AM
St. Thomas Catholic Church, Camas, Washington
CELEBRANT: Fr. Derek Lappe and Fr. Ronald Belisle
INTERMENT Camas Cemetery, Camas, Washington
CASKETBEARERS:
John Weidinger, Eddie Weidinger, David Dietzman
Larry Weidinger, John Dietzman and Don Knipple

“Frank T. Weidinger died Feb. 16, 2004, at home in Camas. He was 86. Frank was born March 26,1917, in Ballantine, MT. He grew up on the family farm and attended grade school and high school on the Huntley Project. Later he went to Marquette University where he received a bachelor's degree. Frank then went to St. Edward's Seminary in Kenmore, WA, and was ordained a priest in June, 1944. He ministered to parishes in the Great Falls-Billings, MT, diocese for 30 years. While pastor of Our Lady of Lourdes in Poplar, MT, (1946-50) Frank learned to fly which facilitated his trips to a mission church of St. Bernard in Charley Creek. By car his trip was two hours of rough driving, in his Piper Cub, fifteen minutes. Frank was a charter member of the National Association of Priest Pilots. Frank's longest stint as pastor was at St. Gabriel's church, Chinook, MT, (1950-71), where he served for 21 years. He built the present church during his pastorate. Frank and the Lutheran pastor. Rev. Bruce Dahl, used to do ecumenical services together. The people of Chinook would have had Fr. Weidinger back at any time if the RC Church had allowed a married clergy. In 1971, Frank was reassigned to St. Joseph Church in Great Falls, MT. During his tenure in Great Falls, Frank was chaplain to the Civil Air Patrol and he was active in the National Federation of Priests' Councils. He asked for a leave of absence in August, 1974. Frank then moved to Morden, Manitoba, where he worked in a nursing home. In January, 1975, he and Patricia Halla were married. They moved back to the states in 1976 with their six month old daughter, Mary Pat and settled in Camas, WA. After moving to Camas, WA, Frank worked at Highland Terrace Nursing Home as an activity director. In 1977, he went to work for the Camas School District as a custodian a job he held until his retirement in 1994. Frank was diagnosed with Parkinson's disease in 1996, and in Oct. 2000, he had a stroke. For the past few years Frank was confined to his wheel chair and in the last few months he was bedridden but continued to minister to others in his quiet, prayerful manner. At Frank's funeral many attested to the way he had touched their lives. He is survived by his wife. Pat; a daughter, Mary Pat, and her husband, Chet; a sister, Helen Dietzman of Camas; and two brothers, Charles of Clovis, CA, and Gregory of Billings, MT, as well as two granddaughters, Kylie and Ava.
On the night of February 15, the night before Frank died, family and friends gathered around his bed. Our pastor, Fr. Derek Lappe, came to read the prayers for the dying. When he had finished, Fr. Lappe invited the rest of us to add our prayers so we read Psalms and offered spontaneous prayers. Afterwards the group sang some hymns in English and in Latin. One of the men present used to go with Frank to the nursing home for a songfest each week. He related that they always got a rousing chorus for “Jingle Bells” so we joyously sang "Jingle Bells", followed by “Silent Night” a favorite of Frank's. Frank's theme song was "Home On the Range". We ended the evening of singing with gusto as we sang this special song. We're sure Frank enjoyed the serenade even though he couldn't join in. The group left about 11:30 PM. Frank was still breathing quite laboriously, but he didn't seem to be in any pain. Mary Pat and I did what we could to make Frank comfortable. Then we blessed him, kissed him and left him to sleep.
Even though I was sleeping on a cot beside his bed, I heard nothing. Frank slipped away quietly some time between 2:00 and 4:00 AM. Mary Pat came to check on her dad about 4:00. She awoke me to say that he was gone. We washed Frank's body as we read prayers and anointed it with lotion. Mary Pat shaved and groomed her dad and then we covered him up to await the mortician. Our eight year old granddaughter, Kylie, came in to kiss papa good-bye. We dressed Frank in a blue clergy shirt with a Roman collar long with his stole. Frank was no longer physically present but there was a joy for us knowing that now he was whole again enjoying the reward for which he lived his whole life.
The night before the funeral we had a Vigil Service, which consisted of the Scriptural Rosary, Luminous Mysteries, as well as other prayers and songs. The presiders, Pam and Kevin Myles, related the mysteries of the rosary to Frank's life. Many present took the opportunity to tell how their lives had been touched by Frank, in his quiet, peaceful way. Before the final hymn, "Soon and Very Soon", we sang Frank's theme song, "Home on the Range". It was a little difficult to sing, seeing Frank lying there in the casket but again the realization of his happiness led to ours as we sang, “Soon and Very Soon” and clapped as we sang. The Consolation Ministry at St. Thomas served refreshments after the service.
The funeral was celebrated on February 20, at St. Thomas Church. Our former pastor, Rev. Ronald Belisle, was celebrant and our pastor. Rev. Derek Lappe concelebrated. There were also many members of the Umbrella Group (Portland/Vancouver non-canonical priests present. School personnel that Frank had worked with were in attendance along with many other friends and family.
Because nature was so important to Frank, the readings we chose as well as the memorial cards spoke of this love of his. The service opened with the hymn, "Come Unto Me".
The first reading was from Is. 25:6-9; Responsorial Psalm 27; the second reading was ICor. 13:1-8, 13; the Gospel, the Transfiguration. In his homily Fr. Belisle talked about the bittersweet qualities of death. The offertory gifts were brought to the altar by our daughter, Mary Pat, and her family. A number of people remarked how touching it was to see them carrying baby, Ava. "Salve Regina" was sung in Latin for the offertory hymn. Before the final hymn "How Great Thou Art" we sang the theme song again. David Dahl, son of Rev. Bruce Dahl who had served with Frank in Chinook, MT, delivered a eulogy. Later in the day I received a letter from Pastor Dahl. The message was about Frank and it contained the same thoughts that were in the comments that David had given. As we were leaving the Church three jets flew over. I said it was in honor of Frank but my nephew pointed out, “No, Frank was a peaceful person. Those are instruments of war.” The bittersweet that Father spoke of in his homily. Burial took place at the Camas cemetery, which is up the hill from St. Thomas. The day was perfect in every way, from the weather to the sense of celebration of a life well lived. A beautiful tribute to a wonderful man! We had a luncheon served by ladies of the parish. One of our friends, Blaise Feeney, brought some Pisano wine for the luncheon because he said, “You can't have a celebration for Frank without Pisano.” There were many pictures of Frank's life displayed on a board our nieces had prepared. We also had a video of his life which played continuously during the luncheon. Frank's two brothers Charles and wife, Wilma, and Gregory were here for the funeral. Helen, Frank's sister, lives here in Camas. My sister and brother-in-law came from Chicago. There were also a number of nieces and nephews present. It's hard to go into the empty room but my spirits are lifted when I realize that now Frank is whole, vibrant and happy. He is reaping the reward for which he lived his whole life while witnessing to the love and goodness of God.”

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“John E. "Jack" Redington, a lifelong resident of Kirkwood died Wednesday, August 20, 2003, of cancer. He was 71 years old. Mr. Redington was president and C.E.O. of J. E. Redington Company, a family owned full-service plumbing company located at 639 Leffingwell in Kirkwood.
The company was founded in 1929 by Mr. Redington's father. In the 1970s, Mr. Redington and his brother Jim took over the family business. Jim Redington died in 1984. Mr. Redington's sons, Richard (Rick) and Jeffrey (Jeff) Redington, work for the family business.
Mr. Redington was active in the Kirkwood community, and well-known for his informative and sometimes crusading advertisements. He took on congress one year, lobbying through his ads to repeal the "Low Flow" law, which limited water usage through toilets, faucets and showers.
Mr. Redington was a St. Louis County election judge in Kirkwood and Webster Groves. He was a member of the Kirkwood Area Chamber of Commerce; Kirkwood Rotary Club; Disabled Advisory and Awareness Commission; Missouri State Plumbing Board and the Missouri Association of Plumbing and Heating Contractors.
Mr. Redington was the husband of Jeanne A. Redington (nee Coleman) for 47 years: father of Beth (Mike) Wait, Rick Redington (Lynn O'Toole), Jack (Kathy) Redington, Jeff (Michelle) Redington; grandfather of Emily and Eric Wait, Rick Jr., Suzie, Jennifer, Jessica and Katie Redington; brother of Jerome (Torie), Agnes (Robert.) Murphy, Eugene, Dennis (Judi), David (Jan), Rosalie (Michael) Duvall, Tom (Yolanda). Michael (Barbara), Mary Ellen (Jim) Deimeke and the late Jim Redington; son-in-law of Dorothy Coleman; brother-in-law, uncle, great-uncle, cousin and friend to many.
A funeral Mass was held Aug. 23, at St. Peter Catholic Church in Kirkwood. Interment, Calvary Cemetery. Memorials may be made to the St. Vincent de Paul Society, 243 Argonne Drive, Kirkwood, Mo., 63122; or Catholic Charities, 4532 Lindell Blvd., St. Louis, MO.,63108.”

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“The Mass of the Resurrection was celebrated for James (Jim) Peters, 68, Grant County Commissioner and highly esteemed retired business operator, on Monday morning at St. Lawrence Catholic Church. His sudden death on April 30,2003, came as a great shock to his family and this community since he had not been ill.
Peters and his wife, Patricia, had owned and operated Milbank Hatchery from 1969 to 1999. During his business career he had been active in the Milbank Chamber of Commerce and had received awards for his sales records by Zip Feeds, Sioux Steel Company, Behlen Manufacturing and Pioneer Corn Company. He was elected to the Grant County Commission in 2000 and served as chairman in 2002. Prior to going into business, he had engaged in farming.
A lifelong resident of the Milbank community, James Leonard Peters was born November 7, 1934, in Milbank to Jacob and Helena (Spanjers) Peters. He graduated from Milbank High School in 1952.
From 1952 to 1961 he served his country with the 740th Transportation Company of the Army National Guard in Milbank. He was the ninth person to enlist with the 740th.
He was united in marriage with Patricia (Pat) A. Cronin on June 28, 1958, at a wedding ceremony at St. Lawrence. They were the parents of one son and six daughters.
Devout members of St. Lawrence parish, he and his wife were daily attendants at mass. During his career he had devoted many hours to teaching religious classes for youth of the congregation, had served as education coordinator, and had been a member of the church council and the finance committee. Active as a member of the Abbot Hess Council of the Knights of Columbus, he had held various offices including that of grand knight. At present he was involved with the R.C.I.A program.
His devotion to his family was well known as he had spent many hours supporting the children in various school and college activities in which they were participants.
An enthusiastic sportsman, he enjoyed hunting and fishing and shared his love for outdoor activities with his family and a host of friends.
In the business and farming community, he was noted for his friendliness, his trustworthiness, his hard work and his generosity. As a commissioner he had demonstrated his ability and determination to work for die best interest of his constituents and the county.
Officiating at the funeral mass was the pastor. Father Wilfrid Lambertz, OSB, assisted by Rev. John Spanjers, a relative, and Father Ray Otto, OSB. Musicians were Sandy Tuchoike, organist; Deb Rausch and Steve Karels, vocalists, and the St. Lawrence Funeral Choir.
The Peters children served as lectors and following the mass they and several grandchildren paid tribute to their father, expressing appreciation for the faith he had instilled in them and for the loving care and support he had given them.
The service was broadcast in the chapel of Our Lady of Guadeloupe and the church auditorium for the benefit of those who could not be seated in the church.
Interment was in St. Lawrence Catholic Cemetery. Military honors were presented by the American Legion, Birch-Miller Post No. 9 and the VFW Grant County Post No. 3486. Honorary bearers were Dick Berens, Paul Dummann, Tim Jurgens, Tom Koeniguer, Gene Mann, Jim Meyers, Roger McCulloch. Randy Ohm, Dan (Duke) Tietjen, Clayton Tuchoike, Dave Waletich and Bill Weber.
Casket bearers were Jason Cronin, Joseph Cronin, Robert Cronin, Gregory Hansmann, Steven Hansmann, David Osberg, Danny Osberg, Michael Osberg, Tom Osberg, Jeffrey Schutz, Ronald Schutz and William Peters.
The Grant County Courthouse was closed Monday until 1 p.m. in Peters' honor. The commissioners and county employees, members of the VFW, American Legion and Knights of Columbus attended the rites in a group.
The wake service had been held at the church on Sunday evening.
Surviving him are his wife of 45 years. Pat, Milbank; seven children: Lori A. Dempf and husband, R. Christopher, and their four children, Clara, Peter, Anna and Jake, all of Albany, NY; Timothy Peters and wife, Alexandra, and their two children, Olivia and John Patrick, Minneapolis, MN; CoUette S. Peters and husband, Lynn Snyder, Golden, CO; Bernadette Peters, and Rebecca Peters, both of Wood-bury, MN, and Bridget Peters and Maggie Peters, both of Albany, NY.
Also surviving are two brothers, John "Jack" Peters, Eden Prairie, MN, and Joseph Peters, Newport News, VA, and a sister, Joanne Schutz, Adrian, MN.
Mundwiler Funeral Home was in charge of the arrangements.”

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Mass of Resurrection Program
Love One another, my dear family! Seek rather what unites, not what may separate you from one another. As I take leave, or better still, as I say "till we meet again" let me remind you of the most important things in life: OUR BLESSED SAVIOR JESUS: HIS GOOD NEWS: HIS HOLY CHURCH: TRUTH AND KINDNESS...I SHALL REMEMBER YOU ALL AND PRAY FOR YOU...
The Memorare: Remember, 0 most gracious Virgin Mary that never was it known that anyone who fled to thy protection, implored thy help, or sought thy intercession was left unaided. Inspired by this confidence, I fly unto thee 0 Virgin of virgins, my mother. To thee do I come; before thee I stand, sinful and sorrowful. 0 Mother of the Word Incarnate, despise not my petitions, but in thy mercy, hear and answer me. Amen.

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A SHORT BIOGRAPHY BY HIS CHILDREN
Jim was an avid and accomplished outdoorsman. His favorite outdoor activities were ice fishing, boat fishing and hunting with his brothers, children, sons-in-law, grandchildren, cousins, nephews, in-laws and many Close friends. Aside from his business, parish, community and recreational accomplishments, Jim's greatest: legacy will be his nearly forty-five year marriage and his undivided devotion to his wife, children and grandchildren. Together, Jim and Pat raised seven children, each of whom has successfully pursued educational and professional endeavors throughout the country, yet always returned home for their Dad's favorite holidays, including Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easier, the Fourth of July and the South Dakota Pheasant Opener. Jim never missed an opportunity to attend his children's sporting, rodeo, theatrical, and musical events both locally and at the college level. Jim is survived by is wife. Pat and seven children: Lori A. Dempf, her husband R. Christopher Deinpf, and their four children, Clara, Peter, Anna, and Jake of Albany, MY; Timothy, his wife Alexandra, and their two children, Olivia and John Patrick of Minneapolis, MN; Collelte S. Peters and her husband Lynn Snyder of Golden, CO; Bernadette of Woodbury, MN; Rebecca of Woodbury, MN; Bridget of Albany, NY; Maggie of Albany, NY; brothers John "Jack" of Eden Prairie, MN and Joseph of Newport News, Virginia; and sister Joanne Schutz of Adrian, MN. He will be forever missed by all those fortunate enough to know and love him.

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BUTTE – Father William Waggenor, 82, died on the afternoon of Dec. 5,2002, at St. Patrick Hospital in Missoula. William Louis Waggenor was born in Butte on June 11,1920, the son of W. L. Waggenor and Anne Haggerty. He attended schools in Butte and graduated from Carroll College in Helena.
He is a veteran of World War II, serving with the 4141st Quartermaster Service Company, 5th Engineer Special Brigade. While serving in the European Theater, he participated in the Invasion of Normandy, landing on Omaha Beach on D-Day, June 6, 1944.
Following his military service, he attended St. Edward Seminary in Seattle, Wash., and was ordained a priest for the Diocese of Helena on April 30,1952.
After a summer assignment at Browning, Father Bill served as registrar at Carroll College for 12 years. He was assigned as Pastor of St. Thomas the Apostle Parish in Helmville in July of 1964. He moved to St. Bartholomew Parish in White Sulphur Springs in July of 1969 and to St. James Parish in Plains in July of 1972. In 1975, St. William Parish in Thompson Falls was added to his responsibilities. In July of 1980 he was assigned as Pastor of St. Teresa of Avila Parish in Whitehall, where he served until being appointed Pastor of St. John the Baptist Parish in Frenchtown in July of 1983. In September of 1984 he became Pastor of Sacred Heart Parish in Ronan, where he served until accepting Senior Status in the Diocese in July of 1990. In April of 2002, Father Bill celebrated his 50th anniversary of priesthood.
His parents and his brother preceded him in death. He is survived by five cousins: James Haggerty, John Haggerty, Margaret Haggerty, Elizabeth Baldridge and Alice Amies.
Visitation begins at St. Patrick Church in Butte at 3 p.m. on Monday, Dec. 9, with the Vigil Service at 7 p.m. The Funeral Liturgy will be celebrated on Tuesday at 11 a.m. at St. Patrick Church. Burial will be at the Priests' Plot at Holy Cross Cemetery. A luncheon will follow at St. Ann Parish Hall, 2100 Farragut.”

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“The Winds of Grace always blow,
it is up to us to raise our sails!”

Heard at an Al-Anon meeting

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